


Mind Games

by Shire55



Category: P/C - Fandom, P/C h/c, Picard/Crusher, Star Trek TNG - Fandom, TNG - Fandom
Genre: F/M, M/M, Multi, Other, P/C h/c - Freeform, TNG, p/c
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-15
Updated: 2011-12-15
Packaged: 2017-10-27 09:12:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 23,380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/294111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shire55/pseuds/Shire55





	Mind Games

Will Riker was bored.....and angry.....and worried. He sat  
and stared sullenly through the view screen at the planet below.  
Of all the duties required of him, he found waiting the hardest.  
The crew had long since learned to work around, him and in turn,  
he had curbed his constant queries as to the ship's status, but  
it was an uneasy truce at best. There was tension aboard and it  
was slowly increasing.  
The latest medical report from the CMO on the health of the  
Captain was less than encouraging. Their current mission was delicate,  
the sort of convoluted mess that seem to be handed to the Enterprise  
on a regular basis. Knowing such missions were given to the Enterprise  
only because of the ship's outstanding record was cold comfort  
to her crew. The stress was considerable, especially on the command  
crew, and in particular, Captain Jean-Luc Picard.  
The Captain was uppermost in the thoughts of the Chief Medical  
Officer, Beverley Crusher. She had seen him only briefly during  
the past two weeks and what she'd seen did not please her. He  
was slowly becoming exhausted. Never one to eat well at the best  
of times, he had lost weight and looked pale and drawn. Her efforts  
to rectify this situation had only succeeded in irritating him,  
making it less likely he would return to the ship, or at the very  
least, he would avoid her if he did. She knew this mission was  
vital to the stability of the sector and she also knew the truth,  
that the Captain was probably the best man for the job, but as  
his doctor she could see the toll the mission was taking. As his  
friend she knew how badly he wanted to succeed. One thing was  
certain....he would not give up.

 

 

 

The man in question was trying to get some much needed sleep.  
No matter how he tried, he couldn't find a comfortable position.  
He was hot and he had a headache. In fact, he'd had the headache  
for the past ten days and with each passing day, it had become  
worse. He straightened himself in the bed and raised his hands  
to his throbbing head. If he could just touch the pain.....somehow  
ease the dreadful pounding, even if just for a little while....He  
groaned softly and gently rubbed his head. A soft chiming signalled  
it was time to resume the negotiations. With his eyes closed he  
slowly sat up and, after a pause, gingerly stood. He waited as  
the sickening thudding settled and cautiously opened his eyes.  
As he knew it would, the light lanced in with such a brutal burst  
of pain he thought he would vomit. Breathing rhythmically, he  
calmed his pulse and made his way to the bathroom and struggled  
to complete his ablutions.  
These "rest periods" were supposed to allow for meals  
to be taken and strategies to be planned, but all Jean-Luc wanted  
to do was sleep....sleep and rid himself of the monstrous thing  
in his head. He made his way to the conference room and took his  
place at the table, waiting patiently as the delegates slowly  
filtered in and took their seats. Placing his hands palm down  
on the tabletop he drew a gentle breath and said quietly,  
"Delegates, shall we resume our discussions?"  
There followed four and a half hours of petty arguing, point scoring  
and useless rhetoric, the last twenty minutes of which Picard  
withdrew into himself and devoted all his considerable mental  
powers to staying upright and conscious. After the delegates had  
left the table, still bickering amongst themselves and totally  
ignoring the distressed human, an aide approached the Captain  
and said softly,  
"Are you in need of assistance Sir?"  
Jean-Luc bowed his pulsing head, frightened the tears he felt  
welling would escape his closed eyes.  
"I'm fine thank you, just a little fatigued."  
"As you wish Sir."  
The aide moved away leaving the Captain alone. He could stand  
it no longer. He had to get help. Without opening his eyes, he  
raised a shaking hand and activated his communicator.  
"Picard to Enterprise.....Beam me directly to my quarters.  
Energise."  
As the room dissipated from view he allowed a moment's thought  
as to how to broach this problem with Beverley. She had been so  
insistent in her badgering of him at his last visit to the ship.....if  
he could just get her to give him something for the pain...

 

 

Whilst in sickbay, Beverley had heard the transport request  
and had also heard the pain in his voice. Wasting no time, she  
left sickbay and was on her way to his cabin even as he materialised.  
Jean-Luc looked around and sighed. Not one to vacillate, he quelled  
the pounding in his head as best he could and left his quarters  
immediately. He was composing his speech to Beverley as he entered  
the turbolift.  
Deanna, sensing the Captain's arrival and distress, immediately  
contacted Beverley to which Beverley replied that she was already  
on her way to his quarters.  
Beverley arrived at his cabin and activated the chime. Receiving  
no reply, she repeated her actions and, after three frustrating  
attempts, entered his quarters using her medical override.  
Outside sickbay, Jean-Luc tugged uselessly on his new uniform,  
lifted his head, cleared his throat and strode purposefully into  
Beverley's domain.

 

 

 

Beverley called softly...  
"Jean-Luc?"  
and started to look for him.  
The Captain waved away a staff member who had come to him and  
quickly determined that Beverley was not in attendance. Entering  
her office, he noticed a loaded hypospray on the bench and idly  
picked it up whilst he thought how to deflect Beverley's concern  
over his well being. He reached up and absently rubbed the right  
temple, wishing all the more that he could make the horrible pain  
disappear. Looking more carefully, he realised what he had in  
his hand was a full vial of a powerful analgesic. The idea struck  
with an almost physical jolt. It all seemed so simple. He could  
use the pain killer, complete the negotiations and be back on  
board before anyone realised the hypo was missing. Raising his  
head he said,  
"Transporter room, this is Picard. Please beam me to my quarters  
planetside. Energise."  
Beverley, having ascertained that Picard was not in his cabin,  
exited with a perplexed look on her face.  
"Where the hell is he?"  
Making haste, she returned to sickbay to be told that the Captain  
had been there, but had beamed off the ship a few moments before  
she arrived. It was a very confused doctor who took her seat in  
her office and called the Captain.  
"Yes Beverley, what can I do for you?"  
"Captain, you came to sickbay. Is there anything wrong?"  
Jean-Luc sighed and closed his eyes. Above all else he hated lying  
to Beverley. She was a dear friend of many years standing and  
deserved better.  
"No doctor. Everything's fine."  
Beverley's suspicions were aroused.  
"Ok Jean-Luc, but you call me if you need me.....anytime."  
"Will do. Picard out."  
Beverley, after a moments thought, contacted Deanna.  
"Deanna, I didn't get to see the Captain....he beamed back  
down before I made it back to sickbay. Can you feel anything?"  
"Not really. I could feel he was in pain when he was on board,  
but there are too many strong emotions coming up from the planet  
for me to focus on him."  
"Keep trying will you.....something's up."

Taking a shaky breath, Jean-Luc sat on the bed and look hard  
at the hypospray in his hand, his head nodding in sync with his  
painful pulse. He raised the hypo to his neck, closed his eyes  
and injected himself.  
The relief was immediate. He almost sobbed with thankfulness as  
he felt the all encompassing pain recede then vanish completely.  
Sitting for a moment, he gathered his thoughts then made his way  
to a computer terminal and called up the texts of the latest round  
of the negotiations. An hour passed before he was summoned to  
the chambers for the resumption of talks. He felt refreshed and  
rested and for the first time in many days, he felt confident  
of bringing the recalcitrant parties to a successful conclusion.  
In keeping with his improved attitude, the talks did make some  
headway and Jean-Luc was well satisfied when he returned to his  
billet at the end of the day. Feeling hunger for the first time  
in a while, Jean-Luc replicated a light meal and turned in, looking  
forward to a real night's rest.

 

The corridor seemed to go on forever. Everything was monochrome,  
a sterility that could be felt and smelled. He could see but he  
had no control. Horizontal on a table he felt the restraints....uncompromising,  
cold, hard. He needed to void his bladder. No speech came from  
his mouth....he could make no sound, just feel. He felt the catheter,  
the humiliation. No....NO! They are in my mind!...stealing my  
thoughts....Noooo! Somebody help me! Please, oh God please somebody....Invasion  
of privacy, private places. Now their song. Whispers in his head.  
Scream! Stop!  
Who are they? Why are they doing this? Oh God, the pain....Please...No  
more.....  
"You are Locutus of Borg......"  
He woke up screaming, clutching his head.  
The headache was back.  


 

"Doctor Crusher, we've completed the re-callibration  
of the tricorders. What would you like us to do now?"  
Alyssa Ogowa was standing next to Beverley in the main sickbay.  
"Do you hate these inventories as much as I do Alyssa?"  
Laughing, Alyssa said,  
" Hey, you're the boss! I just do as I'm told. Count this,  
shift that....Yes Ma'am!"  
Beverley lifted her head and looked imperiously down her nose  
and said wryly,  
"Just you remember who has to answer to the Captain if anything  
goes wrong. Now, where were we? Oh yes. I'd like you to run a  
diagnostic on the hyposprays and catalogue the vials of pharmaceuticals  
we have left. We may have to synthesise some more anti-inflamatories.  
The number of sprains coming from that new holodeck kayaking program  
is staggering."  
Alyssa went to begin her new task as Beverley entered her office.  
Her thoughts had once again turned to Jean-Luc and with him in  
mind, she called up his medical record.  
"Now....let me see....."  
Some time passed as she perused the text, comparing notations  
and observations, until suddenly she sat up and laughed out loud,  
startling Alyssa who had quietly entered the office.  
"Care to share doctor?"  
"It's the Captain Alyssa. I've got him now, he's long overdue  
for a physical and I'm going to order him here as soon as he comes  
aboard.....for whatever reason! He won't get away from me this  
time. Now, what can I do for you?"  
"Well doctor.....we have a mystery here. We're missing a  
hypospray and a full vial of Temapazine. We did a full count and  
checked twice. They're "missing"."  
Beverley frowned.  
"Temapazine is a potent analgesic.....when was it last used?"  
Checking her PADD, Alyssa said,  
"This morning doctor. Ensign Anders had a nasty plasma burn  
from the ruptured conduit on deck eighteen."  
Beverley's head shot up.  
"Yes! It was chaotic here for a while. Selar and I were treating  
those kids from the Alpine Simulation. Who programmed the avalanche,  
by the way? They were scared stiff. I treated Anders and nurse  
Beck took over, then cleaned up."  
Alyssa nodded.  
"That's right. Beck said he left the hyposray on the bench  
over there. He went to help Dr.Selar, meaning to put it away later,  
but forgot. Then Ms. Essot came in to deliver her litter and things  
became busy again."  
Sighing, Beverley stood up.  
"Well we'll just have to find it. It must be here somewhere."

 

 

Jean-Luc lay curled in a foetal position, terrified and  
trembling, cradling his skull in his hands. His head was throbbing  
so badly he had vomited in his bed and could do nothing but lie  
in his own filth and try to regain some semblance of control.  
He focused his tortured mind and began to calm his ragged breathing.  
Slowly, as his respiration calmed, his heart rate lowered and  
the pounding of his head lessened enough for him to open his eyes  
and find the hypospray on the nightstand. With a shaking hand  
he injected the analgesic and sighed as he waited for relief.  
It came, as blessedly as the first time, and for a second he thought  
it had taken longer, but discarded that thought by realising that  
the severity of the pain made it harder to overcome this time.  
Being a fastidious man, Jean-Luc wasted no time revelling in his  
relief. He abruptly left the bed, stripped the soiled bedding  
and went and showered. Having thoroughly cleaned himself, he remade  
the bed with fresh linens and replicated a new uniform. Once satisfied  
all was in order, he obtained a light meal and after eating, settled  
down with a cup of Earl Grey to devote some thought to what had  
occurred. It had been a long time since he had any nightmares  
concerning the Borg, particularly as bad as this one had been.  
That it happened, and the recurring headache was cause for concern,  
but he decided to put it from his mind until after the negotiations.....then  
perhaps he might mention it to Counsellor Troi.

 

 

 

Beverley Crusher stood in front of her staff and asked  
for the second time if anyone could shed any light on the mystery  
of the missing hypospray. Shaking heads and blank looks were her  
only replies.  
"Look people, I'm not accusing anybody of anything, but we  
have a hypospray loaded with a full vial of Temapazine missing.  
That's potent stuff.....not something that should be used without  
medical supervision. If someone is helping a person in need....for  
whatever reason, you have 30 minutes to return the hypo, then  
you can see me in my office in private. That is all."  
Beverley entered her office and contacted Deanna Troi.  
"Deanna, could you come to my office please? There's something  
I think we should discuss."  
"On my way. Troi out."  
Within minutes Deanna was seated opposite Beverley, concerned  
by her friend's dour visage.  
"What is it?"  
Beverley sighed.  
"Earlier this afternoon we discovered a hypospray was missing  
and with it, a full vial of Temapazine. So far no one has admitted  
taking it, so a few moments ago I told the entire staff that whoever  
was responsible had 30 minutes to return it."  
"And?"  
Shaking her head Beverley said,  
"Nothing yet, although there's still time. The thing is....I  
don't think anyone here took it. I know my staff and I feel confident  
that if someone felt the need to even think of this, they would  
come and see me. This is just too serious for anyone from this  
staff to have done."  
Frowning, Deanna leaned forward.  
"I agree with you. What will you do next?"  
Beverley shrugged and leaned back in her chair, looking at the  
ceiling as if hoping for inspiration.  
"I'll wait the full 30 minutes then I'll have to contact  
Will. He will probably put the new head of security....what's  
his name?"  
"......Jarrox."  
"That's him. He'll be put to solving our mystery and if I  
know Data, he'll tag along too. He never lost his taste for Sherlock  
Holmes."  
Deanna laughed and then grew serious.  
"I just hope someone isn't too frightened to seek medical  
help. I'd hate to think some poor soul is suffering needlessly."

 

 

 

The afternoon session of talks had proceeded forward,  
albeit haltingly, until Jean-Luc actually believed progress was  
being made. That was until delegate Uff brought up the very contentious  
Eldron Protocol. It was a dispute that was centuries old and it's  
very mention provoked a shouting match of unparalleled proportions.  
Disgusted, Picard leaped to his feet and pounded his fists on  
the table until he had achieved silence from the protagonists.  
"Enough! If you delegates cannot control yourselves then  
this whole process is pointless! Can't you see that by holding  
on to past hurts you are impeding your passage into the future?  
My own home world wallowed in petty grievances and warred uselessly  
for centuries, almost wiping ourselves out....until we learned  
to let the past be just that....past. Gone. Over. Finished with.  
Learn from it. Go forward delegates, not backwards!"  
Delegate Uff rose suddenly and boldly stuck out his green chin.  
"That's all very well for you to say Captain, but your clan  
didn't lose the grain rights on land that had been traditionally  
yours for all time! The Eldron Protocol was a death sentence for  
my clan! Certainly it was veiled in fine words and good intentions,  
but we suffered and never regained that which was taken from us.  
Of course the protocol authors, the Amm, miraculously prospered  
and enslaved my people, but that's just a coincidence hmmm?"  
"Your words are very pretty Captain, but until you have suffered  
as we have, I suggest you keep your peace. You cannot begin to  
understand what it's been like for us."  
Jean-Luc bowed his head and sighed and as he did, he felt the  
beginning of another headache.  
Delegate Uff....Everyone....These talks represent a very real  
chance for you to unite your people for the benefit of all. Your  
entire planet....one people at last. No more wars, no more famines.  
The grain you so jealously hoard could be grown by everybody on  
land that is shared. Think about it. Stability. Prosperity. Peace.  
And, with the Federation's help, safety. It's up to you. There  
are really only two choices. Stay as you are.....divided, no infrastructure,  
no way to care for your people....chaos....or be prepared to sit  
at this table and make some hard decisions for your world. Swallow  
your pride. It takes courage delegates. Do you have that sort  
of backbone?"  
Delegate Uff laughed derisively.  
"Oh fine speech Captain Picard! I'm glad you mentioned the  
Federation. What do they get out of this? Why did they send the  
illustrious Jean-Luc Picard to our pitiful planet? Do they care  
so much about us that they couldn't stand by and witness our destruction?  
I don't believe they're so altruistic! What does the Federation  
want?"  
By now, Jean-Luc was absently rubbing his right temple.  
"The Federation wants stability in this sector and is willing  
to help you in order to achieve it. Of course you're free to choose  
whomever you wish to form alliances, but if you've done your homework,  
you will be aware of the dangers of aligning yourselves with the  
Cardassians, or the Romulans or the Ferengi. The Federation will  
not subjugate your people or exploit your planet. Our history  
is open for all to see. You knew this when you made first contact.  
Don't think the Federation is so stupid as to offer help, only  
to be bitten by those who asked for that help in the first place."  
Lifting his chin and squaring his shoulders, Jean-Luc looked hard  
at the delegates.  
"I think now would be a good time to close this meeting.  
It's quite late and I'm tired. You delegates have a lot to think  
about. If you're in agreement we can continue tomorrow."  
A murmur of agreement went around the table. Uff, still standing  
muttered,  
"Sleep the sleep of the righteous Captain."  
To which Jean-Luc replied,  
"Sleep the sleep of the brave delegate Uff."

 

 

"So you're sure it wasn't any of your staff?"  
Will stood, feet braced, arms folded, one hand stroking his beard.  
Looking directly into his eyes Beverley replied,  
"Absolutely! Will, someone has taken....I dread to use the  
term, "stolen", a hypospray loaded with a full vial  
of Temapazine and I haven't a clue as to how it was done, or who  
did it."  
Will looked up and said,  
"Lieutenant Jarrox, report to the ready room."  
Within seconds the ready room doors hissed open.  
"Mr. Jarrox, Dr. Crusher has a situation I think you should  
know about. She will brief you, then I want you to start an investigation.  
I will speak to Mr.Data, I think he should assist you. Keep me  
informed of your progress."  
Will rose and left the ready room as Beverley began to enlighten  
Lt. Jarrox.

 

 

 

Jean-Luc entered his suite feeling irritable and tense.  
*It's no wonder I have a damn headache, having to deal with these  
intractable fools!*  
He dropped onto the couch, slipped off his boots and leaning back,  
put his feet on the low table. A gentle groan escaped his lips  
as he massaged his right temple. The pain had settled on the right  
side of his head, behind the right eye and lancing into his head  
rhythmically.  
"Dammit! I DO NOT need this!"  
His appetite gone, Jean-Luc brusquely shed his uniform and lay  
on his bed. As before, he could find no comfortable position and  
he started to feel both hot and decidedly unwell. The pain increased  
rapidly until he found himself lying rigidly, savagely squeezing  
his head between his shaking hands. Fearing he was about to vomit,  
he rolled out of bed, falling the short distance to the floor  
and curling up there, keening in agony. He felt his head was about  
to explode and in desperation he uncurled himself and blindly  
pulled the night stand over, sending the few items there on scattering  
across the floor. Such was his suffering that he began to cry,  
sobbing in great gulps, desperately trying to locate the hypospray.  
Unable to open his eyes, he felt over the floor with one hand,  
the other clawing at his head, fruitlessly trying to relieve the  
pain. Finally his questing hand found the familiar shape and his  
hand instinctively closed on the instrument and brought it immediately  
to his body. Jean-Luc had no idea where he applied the hypo, he  
didn't hear the hiss, all he could do was lie there on the floor,  
waiting, hoping for it to work.

 

 

 

"Lt. Jarrox, when I finished with the hypospray,  
I put it there on the bench, then I went to assist Dr.Selar, and  
then.....oh yeah, Ms. Essot came in to deliver her litter."  
"I see. And you didn't see it again."  
Nurse Beck shook his head.  
"No Sir. I had forgotten all about it till Dr. Crusher asked  
me about it."  
Lt. Jarrox turned to Data and raised his eyebrows. Data cocked  
his head slightly and asked,  
"Is it customary to place medical equipment in such a haphazard  
way? Would it not be better practice to put the equipment back  
in the proper place?"  
Nurse Beck smothered a smile.  
"Yes Sir, of course. But sickbays sometimes don't work that  
way. If an emergency comes in, it's a case of "drop everything"  
and all hands on deck....as it were. When the crisis has passed,  
well, then everything is cleaned, checked, catalogued and returned  
to it's rightful place. In this case, Dr. Crusher chose to do  
an inventory at that time and that's when it was noted as missing."  
Doing his best "Holmes" impression, Data stroked his  
chin and said,  
"So, after you put the hypospray on the bench, you did not  
see it again and you do not know what became of it."  
"Correct, Sir."  
Lt. Jarrox clasped his hands behind his back and thanked the nurse  
for his assistance.  
"Well Sir, what do you think?"  
Data stared blankly then said,  
"We have more staff to interview, but I do not think the  
answer will be forthcoming. Somehow, someone has entered sickbay  
unobtrusively and made off with the hypospray. Our job is to find  
out who and that will tell us how and why. I think it would be  
advantageous to check the logs for that day."

 

 

 

This time he was certain. The Temapazine definitely took  
longer to work and he was dismayed to find that the headache had  
not completely disappeared.  
*What the hell is going on?*  
Looking at the hypospray, he rotated the dosage meter, dialled  
a lesser dose and injected himself again. Scooting across the  
floor to his bed, he leaned back and sighed when he felt the grip  
of the headache let go. This time Jean-Luc wasn't in such a hurry  
to move. He needed to think. How much longer could he do this?  
He knew by now something was seriously wrong and he knew he was  
duty bound to report both his symptoms and the misappropriation  
of the hypospray, but he was so close to finding a resolution  
to the impasse with the delegates. If he could just sway Uff....he  
was the key. The most senior member of his clan, Uff had brought  
his people through the tyranny of serfdom and hopelessness to  
a position of power and prestige, ultimately to be the leading  
clan on the planet. Unfortunately, before any truce was entertained,  
Uff wanted all the other clans, particularly the Amm, to pay dearly  
for the generations of suffering his clan endured. Until this  
seemingly insurmountable hurdle was overcome, Uff would stymie  
all efforts at conciliation. Climbing somewhat unsteadily to his  
feet and after putting the hypospray in his toilet bag, Jean-Luc  
made his way to the computer terminal and called up information  
on the Ty, Uff's clan, and the Amm. He was soon completely immersed,  
forgetting entirely about his "duty".

 

 

Data pushed himself away from the terminal and adopted  
a perplexed look.  
"This is most curious Lt. During the time index indicated,  
the only non medical person, (discounting patients), to enter  
sickbay was Captain Picard. Apparently he came in to see Dr. Crusher,  
but left before she returned. And, equally curious, he chose to  
beam off from sickbay, rather than use a transporter room. Our  
next enquiry should be directed to Dr. Crusher."  
Shortly thereafter Data and Lt. Jarrox entered sickbay and found  
Beverley in her office. She looked up and smiled.  
"How goes it gents?"  
"Pardon?....Oh! We are making headway doctor. May we ask  
you some questions?"  
Becoming immediately serious Beverley said,  
"Of course Data, go right ahead."  
Data took a seat and gestured to Lt. Jarrox to do the same. He  
declined, amusing Beverley who surmised that all security chiefs  
liked to remain standing.  
"The logs from that day, during the time index listed, show  
the only person not accounted for medically in sickbay was Captain  
Picard."  
"Yes! Oh God I forgot. He beamed up from the planet and I  
thought he sounded distressed. He requested transport direct to  
his quarters so I left immediately to meet him there, but when  
I arrived he didn't answer the chime. I eventually entered his  
cabin using the medical override only to find he wasn't there.  
I came straight back to sickbay and was told he had just transported  
back to the planet. Just a minute......Crusher to Troi."  
"Troi here."  
"Deanna, could you please come to sickbay?"  
"On my way."  
Data leaned forward locking his golden eyes with Beverley's.  
"Dr. Crusher, he transported from sickbay. Do you not think  
that is a little odd?"  
Shocked, Beverley sat upright.  
"Data.....you're not suggesting the Captain took.......no......You  
are, aren't you!"  
Placing a placating hand on her arm Data cautiously said,  
"Dr. Crusher....you said yourself that you thought the Captain  
sounded distressed. The logs show he was beamed to his quarters,  
but he left abruptly and came directly here, to sickbay. It was  
very busy and you were not here. We know by that time the hypospray  
was on the bench. The Captain left.....by transporting from sickbay....without  
seeing you.....and the hypospray went missing. Can you offer any  
other explanation?"  
"But Data....he....well he wouldn't......would he?"  
Again, Data tilted his head.  
"Are you asking me doctor?"  
"No Data!"  
As the friends sat looking at each other, the doors his open as  
Deanna arrives.  
Beverley smiled warmly at her.  
"Take a seat Councellor. Tell me, have you had any success  
in sensing the Captain?"  
"Not really. It's very difficult to single him out. The inhabitants  
issue powerful emotions.....I am getting vague feelings of pain  
and frustration sporadically from the Captain, but nothing specific.  
I can't filter out the rest."  
Suddenly Beverley was on her feet.  
"I'm going down to the planet. Please tell Commander Riker  
I will report to him when I return."  
Looking a little stunned Data replied,  
"Yes Doctor."

 

 

Beverley materialised in a small courtyard and was greeted  
by one of the many aides attached to the delegation.  
"May I be of assistance Madam?"  
After looking around with interest Beverley said,  
"Yes. I have come to see Captain Picard. Is he available?"  
"I regret Madam, he is in conference, but there will be a  
short break soon...."  
Gesturing with his arm he offered,  
"Would you like to wait here? Perhaps I could get you a cool  
drink? The air is very dry today."  
With a gracious smile Beverley declined but asked if she could  
be shown to Jean-Juc's suite.  
"Of course Madam! Please, follow me."  
Very soon Beverley found herself at the door to the Captain's  
suite. Bidding goodbye to the aide and making sure he had left,  
she faced the door. Looking around guiltily she opened it and  
peeked in. She knew Jean-Luc wasn't there but she was nervous  
nonetheless. Growing bolder, she entered and found herself in  
a pleasant arrangement of rooms.....a little spartan, but functional.  
She looked about, suddenly uncertain as to her next move.  
*Well......might as well check the obvious.*  
She moved to the night stand and seeing nothing on the surface,  
opened the drawer. Bending slightly she peered into the drawer  
and finding nothing incriminating was just closing it when the  
door swung inward and Jean-Luc stepped into the room, carrying  
his toilet bag.  
"Beverley!? What are you doing here?"  
She walked over to him and stood close.  
"Nice to see you too Jean-Luc."  
Smiling reproachfully he stepped back and amended,  
"I'm sorry. It's wonderful to see you. Now.....what are you  
doing here? Is there something wrong?"  
"Jean-Luc.....two days ago you beamed up to the ship, came  
to sickbay, then beamed back down here without seeing me. I heard  
your request for beam out and I thought you sounded......well....you  
sounded stressed or in pain.....or something and I just wanted  
to come down here and see for myself that you were in one piece."  
Jean-Luc clasped her hands in his.  
"And now that you've seen me.....?"  
Copying Data, Beverley tilted her head to one side.  
"Honestly? You look tired.....and you've lost weight....."  
The Captain dropped the doctor's hands.  
"Beverley! I'm knee deep in negotiations with the most pig-headed,  
stubborn, bloody-minded.....it's no wonderI've got a headache....."  
Seeing Beverley's concern, Jean-Luc reassured her.  
"It's nothing.....a little stubborn perhaps, but under the  
circum...."  
Throwing her hands up, Beverley cut him off.  
"Ok, Ok, I get the picture! It's just that I thought....you  
see there's......Why do you have your toilet bag with you?"  
"What?.....Oh....I like to freshen up.....I find if I shave  
late in the afternoon, it helps to give a good impression....you  
know....get on top of things. Beverley, what is it?"  
Stepping close to him, Beverley ran her hands up his chest and  
over his shoulders.  
"Jean-Luc I'm worried about you. You work very hard and you  
neglect yourself. You would tell me if there was something seriously  
wrong....wouldn't you?"  
Sighing, Jean-Luc leaned gently forward until his head touched  
Beverley's  
"Beverley.....tell me."  
Beverley closed her eyes.  
"Jean-Luc something's happened in sickbay and we want to  
know......."  
~Captain Picard this is Ett, Delegate Uff's aide. The Delegate  
would like to know if you are going to rejoin the conference.....or  
are you too *tired*~  
Jean-Luc stiffened and scowled muttering...  
"That man! Beverley I have to go. I assure you I'm fine.  
Look, I'll be finished here in a few days, I hope. We'll have  
dinner and a nice relaxing evening and you can tell me all about  
it....all right? See you soon."  
And after placing a gentle kiss on her forehead and whispering,  
"I love you", he left, taking the toilet bag with him  
and closing the door behind him. Once in the corridor he leaned  
against the door and closed his eyes.  
*Forgive me Beverley....Please?*

 

 

 

The doors to the turbolift opened but Beverley didn't  
move. Deep in thought she hadn't realised the lift had reached  
it's destination. Will Riker, on hearing the hiss of the doors,  
looked expectantly over to the lift area and was perplexed to  
find no one exiting. Coming to his feet, a smile graced his features  
as he saw who was lost in thought in the lift.  
"Beverley.........Hey! Beverley! Are you getting off here?"  
"Huh? Oh! Yes.....Will, can I see you in the ready room?"  
Without waiting for a reply, she walked straight to the ready  
room, barely waiting for the doors to admit her. Will followed  
her in.  
"It's the Captain, isn't it?"  
Beverley started pacing, absently fiddling with her vibrant hair.  
"Will, did Data tell you of his findings, what he and Jarrox  
concluded about the hypospray?"  
Will stood very still, a counterpoint to Beverley's pacing.  
"Yes he did. You've seen the Captain. What did he say?"  
Beverley stopped pacing and scratched her head.  
"Well, I didn't actually ask him."  
"You didn't ask him? A hypospray loaded with a potent pain  
killer goes missing from sickbay and the only person who could've  
taken it is the Captain.....and you don't ask him? Ok, I give  
up! Why the hell didn't you ask him?"  
Temper rising and fire in her eyes Beverley hissed,  
"Don't take that tone with me Will Riker!"  
But then calms herself....  
"I'm sorry Will. Look something's wrong. I don't know what....call  
it a "doctor" thing.....or women's intuition.....anything,  
just believe me.....something's not right."  
Standing to his full height, with arms akimbo, Will squinted and  
said,  
"Ok, I'll buy that. So, what do we do? Pull him kicking and  
screaming back to the ship and suffer the consequences?"  
"No! This might be something that Jean-Luc needs to sort  
out himself. You know how he is during these sticky missions.  
I don't think he would do anything detrimental to Starfleet or  
the Federation.....do you?"  
"Definitely not!"  
"I agree. So what do we do? I think we should leave him to  
do his job. After all, he is the Captain of the ship. He should  
know what he's doing.....shouldn't he?"  
Beverley's attempt at humour fell flat. Will's worried expression  
killed it.  
"Still Beverley.....we're talking about a powerful analgesic......why  
the hell would he take a hypo full of that to the planet?"  
Defeated, Beverley sat down.  
"I don't know Will. We'll just have to trust him....won't  
we?"

 

 

Something was very, very wrong. Jean-Luc stood, his hands  
braced against the hand basin, trembling and sweating. He had  
just administered two full doses of Temapazine and he could still  
feel the headache, it was a dull throbbing, eating away at his  
resistance, hobbling his mind.....and it was only three and a  
half hours since the last double dose. Shaking, he ran some water  
in the basin and washed his face. What he had told Beverley about  
freshening up was the truth. Without these frequent breaks, time  
to afford a small rest, or the administration of the pain killer,  
he felt sure he would not have been able to continue. It was bad  
enough during the day, but at night it was tortuous. He would  
awaken in agony, usually after a dreadful nightmare....and last  
night he had wet the bed....heaping humiliation on top of everything  
else. And there was still more. He was running out of Temapazine.  
Jean-Luc dried his face then picked up the hypospray. Unloading  
the vial he once more checked the contents. No matter how many  
times he looked, it remained the same. Two, possibly three doses  
left.....and then what? He was close to a resolution with the  
delegates. His research had proved fruitful and he needed to speak  
with delegate Uff in private. Of course this may be nigh on impossible  
given the demeanour of the man, but Jean-Luc would try his best.  
Too much was riding on the situation for anything but success  
to contemplated. But, what to do about the Temapazine? Going back  
to the ship was out of the question. He knew how he looked.....pale,  
gaunt, desperately tired. If Beverley got so much of a glimpse  
she would confine him to sickbay and that would be that. Is that  
an option? Could Will handle this mission? Maybe, but doubtful.  
If Will had been there at the beginning, perhaps it would've been  
possible, but Jean-Luc had gone too far, striven too hard, he  
knew the delegates now, knew how they thought. He understood the  
subtle power struggles and who the real power brokers were,.......he  
had to see it through. So. What to do? And then it came. An idea,  
a hope.  
Opening the door and stepping out, Jean-Luc motioned to one  
of the ever present aides.  
"Yes Sir? How may I be of assistance?"  
"Tell me, are any of the clans adept in medical technology?  
Can they replicate, say....pharmaceuticals?"  
"Oh yes Sir! The Cen are an ancient healing clan. In fact  
there's an old saying...."  
Jean-Luc raised his hands and smiled.  
"Yes, yes, quite. The Cen? That would be delegate Zu would  
it not?"  
"Yes Sir....But if I may be so bold....the man to talk to  
is Dyy, one of the senior acromps. Zu may be the delegate, but  
Dyy is a Cen and he actually runs everything. You know what they  
say.....It's the acromps that run the clans. Ha, Ha!"  
Jean-Luc laughed thinking,  
*I've no idea what you're talking about....oh well, seems harmless  
enough.*  
"So....Dyy....could you ask him to see me at the next break?"  
"Certainly Sir! It would be my pleasure!"  
Jean-Luc thanked the aide then made his way back to the conference.  
The next two and a half hours were fairly routine, progress was  
being made, as long as Uff felt his clan weren't being disadvantaged.  
The headache malevolently increased in strength and by the time  
the break came it took a considerable effort on Picard's part  
to not run to the restroom. He quickly injected himself twice,  
again failing to completely quell the pain, then exited the room  
to find Dyy waiting for him.  
"Ah Dyy. Thank you for meeting me. The aide I spoke to said  
it would be possible for you to organise the replication of pharmaceuticals.  
Is that so?"  
"Yes Sir. What is it you want?"  
*Well, he doesn't beat about the bush.* Jean-Luc thought.  
He produced the vial with it's single remaining dose.  
"I require a single vial of this. It's called Temapazine."  
Dyy took the vial and held it up to the light, slowly rotating  
it, making Picard feel uncomfortable in the process.  
"What is it? If it's a narcotic it will cost you....I would  
have to "grease a few wheels"."  
"No, it's a synthesized analgesic. You can look it up on  
my terminal if you wish. My computer is linked to my ship, and  
thereby, the medical database."  
Dyy ran his eyes up and down the Captain.  
"Oh. What do you want it for? Why don't you get it from your  
ship?"  
Jean-Luc was becoming irritated.  
"My reasons are my own as is my privacy. Can you do it or  
not."  
"Hey...settle down. No need to brush your scales the wrong  
way. It shouldn't be a problem....in fact I could probably get  
it done here. I'll have it for you tonight. Do you have any latinum?.....about  
two strips would do. I'll come by your rooms, agreed?"  
With a curt nod Jean-Luc gave his acceptance. As Dyy left, Picard  
wondered how on earth he was going to make it to the night.

 

 

 

Jean-Luc would never, if asked later, be able to explain  
how he made it through the last session of negotiations and back  
to his quarters. He had snippets, segments of memories, of vomiting,  
crawling across the room to the bathroom and eventually, after  
long agony filled hours, becoming aware of his door chime. Somehow  
he gained his footing and opened the door, only to fall forward  
into the arms of a very startled Dyy. Jean-Luc felt himself being  
half carried into the room and vaguely heard, as if from a distance,  
Dyy asking him something. Although it caused immense pain, Picard  
lifted his pounding head, opened his eyes and set his face at  
Dyy.  
"Captain! What can I do? Where is it?"  
Jean-Luc struggled to form the words.  
"Small black bag....somewhere..."  
He tried to lift an arm to indicate the main room, but the movement  
was beyond him.  
Dyy gently lowered Jean-Luc into a chair and began to search for  
the toilet bag. He came across it quickly....Jean-Luc had dropped  
it just inside the door. Opening the bag with haste, Dyy located,  
then removed the hypospray and loaded it with the new vial then  
went immediately to the Captain and injected him. Nothing happened.  
Picard continued to moan piteously, tears streaming from his closed  
eyes. Again Dyy injected him. After a few moments Jean-Luc lifted  
his head and reached for Dyy.  
"More.....Please one more."  
Without hesitation Dyy administered one more dose.  
With a sigh, Jean-Luc collapsed back in the chair and lowered  
his head into his hands.  
"Mon Dieu....I thought I would die."  
Dyy kneeled in front of the Captain and put his hands on Jean-Luc's  
knees.  
"Captain, I know you value your privacy, but what is it?  
What's happening to you?"  
Jean-Luc slowly raised his head.  
"I don't know. It started over two weeks ago and it's getting  
worse, it's taking more of the drug to stop or even lessen the  
pain."  
"Where is the pain?"  
Jean-Luc raised a quivering hand and placed it over the right  
side of his head. He said nothing.  
"Captain, shall I get a healer? One of my clan?"  
Picard leaned forward and touched Dyy's shoulder.  
"No thank you. When I finish here I will report directly  
to my ship's CMO. I'm sure she will bring me back to my former  
state of good health, but thank you Dyy. I must admit, I misjudged  
you. I apologise."  
"You are trying to save my people....all our people Captain.  
You must forgive our natural distrust, it's an ingrained reaction  
to strangers."  
Jean-Luc managed a weak laugh.  
"Oh, I think you'd be amazed to find how common that reaction  
is."  
Dyy looked around the room.  
"Um Captain....would you like me to help you....clean up?"  
The Captain flushed when he realised what a frightful mess his  
rooms must be in.  
"Ah, no, I'll manage, thank you."  
Jean-Luc noticed that Dyy seemed reluctant to leave. He looked  
about, fidgeted with his face tufts and shifted is feet.  
"Dyy? Is there something else?"  
"Well....Look I know you're sick, and you've got a lot on  
your mind, but I've got young and the stipend as an acromp isn't...."  
Suddenly Picard remembered.  
"The latinum! Ye Gods Dyy....I completely forgot. I am sorry.  
I'll contact the ship right now. Enterprise, this is the Captain.  
Who is the duty officer on the bridge?"  
~Lieutenant Marks Sir.~  
"Lt. Marks, please instigate a direct vocal link with the  
ship's computer."  
~Aye Sir. Uplink complete.~  
"Thank you. Computer release three strips of gold pressed  
latinum from ship's resources and beam them to my present location.  
Authorisation Picard, omega two eight."  
~Processing. Request authorised. Enabled.~  
Three strips of latinum appeared on the table in Picard's quarters.  
Jean-Luc picked them up and gave them to Dyy.  
"Captain, I believe I said two strips."  
Jean-Luc smiled.  
"From what I hear, young are expensive to rear."  
That brought a chuckle from Dyy.  
"They are indeed. Well, I will go Captain. I hope you are  
feeling better soon."  
"Thank you again Dyy, but may I ask that you not mention  
this to anybody? My CMO has been known to resort to some vicious  
retaliation when she finds out someone has failed to be less than  
honest with her."  
"Of course Captain. Well, goodnight."  
After Dyy had left Jean-Luc started the onerous task of cleaning  
his room....and the bathroom. When he had finished, he showered  
and forced down some dry biscuits and Earl Grey and retired for  
the night, exhausted.

 

 

"Hi Beverley. Mind if I come in?"  
Beverley looked up and laughed.  
"Will if all my callers were as handsome as you I'd never  
say no!"  
Smiling, Will approached the desk, turned a chair around and straddled  
it.  
"What can I do for you Commander?"  
"Our mystery deepens. When I came on duty this morning the  
delta shift duty officer informed me that at 03.45 this morning  
our Captain requested the computer to release three strips of  
latinum from ship's resources. The authorisation code was correct  
and it was the Captain's voice, I checked."  
The doctor sat back, tapping a stylus against her lips.  
"What the hell is going on? Why would he need latinum.....at  
3.45am? Will this is getting weird. There's nothing to spend latinum  
on down there that he could possibly need."  
"I know. Still want to leave him to it?"  
Beverley was silent for a few moments then looking hard at Will  
said,  
"Yes, for now.....but not for too much longer."

 

 

 

By now when Jean-Luc awoke screaming in pain, it had almost  
become routine. He had gone to sleep with the hypospray in his  
hand and it took little effort to press it to his leg and release  
the drug into his system....three times. He lay there in his soiled  
bed desperately trying to regain control of his ragged breathing.  
Chancing a look at the clock he realised he'd only slept two and  
a half hours. He was bone weary, his need for restful sleep so  
keen it brought tears to his eyes. He felt utterly wretched, nauseous  
and in constant varying degrees of pain, but.....he had finally  
been given permission to see Uff privately. Jean-Luc felt positive  
he could make Uff see sense if he could talk to the man without  
the need for Uff to keep up the pretence of saviour to his clan.  
In a few short hours they would meet and the Captain had to be  
ready. Focusing on those thoughts Jean-Luc methodically cleaned  
his bed, then himself and sat at the table for several minutes  
until he could force down the light meal he had prepared. Successfully  
negotiating the meal, Jean-Luc sat quietly in the easy chair dozing,  
trying to garner some energy. His internal clock woke him and  
he realised he had only fifteen minutes until the meeting. The  
ubiquitous headache had increased in magnitude as he napped and  
his automatic reaction with the hypospray passed without conscious  
thought. As he stood he noted a slight dizziness, an uneven beating  
of his heart and a flushing over his whole body. Running his hands  
over his pate and taking a large breath, he left his quarters.  
The office chosen for the meeting was well lit and comfortable.  
Uff was waiting for the Captain and appeared to be in good humour.  
*Well that's a start*, Picard thought hopefully.  
"Delegate Uff, thank you for seeing me."  
Taking a seat and gesturing for Jean-Luc to do the same, the men  
sat and regarded each other.  
"Is it customary for your species to change colour?"  
"I beg your pardon?"  
"Captain, you are not the same colour you were when this  
conference started. Your skin has paled and you have darkness  
under your eyes. Your body mass has decreased also....is there  
something wrong?"  
The Captain sat back and drew a large breath. His right hand made  
it's way to his temple automatically and he closed his eyes momentarily.  
"Delegate Uff. My physical characteristics are not at issue  
here. I assure you I am fully able to continue with the conference.  
I have requested this meeting with you to again implore you to  
rethink you position on the unification."  
Uff adopted a pugnacious look, causing his neck ruff to bristle.  
"I have heard nothing that would make me change my position  
Captain."  
Picard lowered his throbbing head.  
"But are you doing it for the right reasons?"  
Now Uff was clearly irritated.  
"You question my wisdom? You have been on this planet, what?....two  
weeks? and you think you can just breeze in and rectify hundreds  
of years of tyranny? How could you be so naive! I was led to believe  
you were a highly credentialled diplomat, not some simpering fool  
with delusions of grandeur. How dare you!"  
Slowly shaking his head, the Captain waved away Uff"s angry  
words with a tired hand.  
"Delegate Uff, just listen to what I have to say, then either  
the conference will go on or I will return to my ship."  
A curt nod was the only reply Jean-Luc received.  
"The subjugation of your clan has been going on for a very  
long time. The Eldron Protocol only served to legitimise what  
had befallen your clan. But....things have been improving. I admit  
it has taken a long time, but each generation has managed to produce  
delegates of high quality.....your own father was one of the  
best, and all the while the goal has been for unification and  
equality. Until you succeeded your father as Chief Delegate, suddenly  
the agenda changed. Gone were the overtures of friendship and  
forgiveness that had so long been the main thrust of the campaign  
and in it's place came the idea of supremacy. Under your leadership  
the Ty have become aggressive activists with no other goal but  
to put under duress all the clans that had ever perpetrated an  
unkind act against the Ty. Now why was that? That's what I searched  
for Uff. What happened to change the manifesto so completely?  
Then I found it.  
During the peace conferences of the eighth term, your father  
developed a strong friendship with Delegate Prou of Clan Amm.  
Their relationship deepened and by the conference end, they had  
become lovers, but they couldn't continue their tryst. Once the  
conference ended they had to return to their own lands, after  
all, a union of a high bred Amm and a lesser Ty was scandalous.....wasn't  
it? But Prou was pregnant....with you.  
She carried you in secrecy and when the time of your birth was  
imminent, she went to a Cen healing centre, delivered you and  
left the next day...all in complete seclusion. No one else but  
her most trusted aides knew. She effectively abandoned you. But...she  
cared enough to get a message to your father. He arrived at the  
clinic two days later and after a simple paternity test, took  
you home. The rest is a matter of public history.  
Who are you punishing with your hardline tactics Uff? Your  
mother? Your father? Who do you blame the most?"  
Silence settled oppressively. Jean-Luc could feel the anger coming  
from the delegate in cold waves. As his vision began to double  
he closed his eyes.  
"Oh so clever! My secret is out. Not only am I the product  
of a tawdry, tasteless affair, but I am also of impure blood!  
Do you know what that means here Picard? I am unclean. Unclean!"  
"It's draconian social beliefs like that, that you can change!  
Don't you see Uff? You can make those changes....make it so no  
member of your species ever feels as you do now. Your "mixed"  
parentage is exactly the demonstration your people need. You CAN  
live as one people Uff, but it's up to you. You and I both know  
where the real power lies. Not one delegate will vote against  
you, no matter what you choose to do. You have it in your power  
to create a new nation of people, united at last."  
Jean-Luc suddenly felt close to fainting. Again his heart implant  
was malfunctioning and nausea threatened to overwhelm him. He  
tried to get to his feet but his knees buckled and he fell to  
the floor.  
"Captain Picard!"  
Uff was instantly by Jean-Luc's side, supporting the sick man's  
head.  
"I will summon a healer"  
"No! No don't. Just help me back to my quarters....I have  
medicine there."  
Getting Jean-Luc to his feet was difficult and so was the thankfully  
short journey to his suite. Once inside Uff retrieved the toilet  
bag and helped the Captain to administer four shots. When he was  
able, Jean-Luc took Uff's hand and looked searchingly into the  
delegate's face.  
"Think about what I said Uff. Turn your shame into something  
good."  
Uff stood to his full impressive height.  
"You are ill Captain. Rest here....I will call a sitting  
of the conference later this afternoon."  
And with that, he left.  
Jean-Luc could no longer see properly. His irregular heartbeat  
made him light headed and dizzy. He lay on his bed shivering as  
beads of sweat coursed down his face.  
"De trop, de trop....enough."

 

 

 

"Will, do you think we should contact the Captain?  
There's been no word....he hasn't beamed aboard....it's been what,  
three days now? I don't like this silence."  
Scratching his beard absently Will studied Beverley.  
"Missing the old fella eh?"  
Beverley's face reddened.  
"Will! Don't you ever let the Captain hear you call him that!  
He'll keelhaul you or something....something worse....and *I*  
will help him."  
Will laughed delightedly, enjoying this form of repartee.  
"You're right. I'll give him a call now. Captain Picard this  
is the Enterprise..."  
Beverley turned and grinned at Will. Sotto voiced she said,  
"If he gets mad, it'll be your fault."  
"No response Sir."  
Frowning, Will sat up straighter.  
"Captain Picard, this is the Enterprise. Respond please."  
After a tense wait, Jean-Luc's roughened voice answered.  
"Enterprise this is the Captain. What do you want?"  
The smiles disappeared instantly.  
"Captain, are you all right?"  
"Beverley, I'm fine....I was asleep. Why did you call?"  
"No particular reason Captain. We hadn't heard from you for  
a while, we just wanted to know how things were going."  
"Slowly doctor, slowly. I may know more this afternoon. Until  
then I intend to sleep, so if you will excuse me....Picard out."  
Will and Beverley looked at each other, somewhat taken aback.  
"Is he always so grumpy when he wakes up?"  
"No Will, he isn't."

 

 

 

The gentle beeping of the alarm was finally heard  
by the wretched man on the floor. He was beyond the limit of endurance,  
he was certain death was imminent. No one was meant to withstand  
pain of this severity. With the last vestige of strength and will  
Jean-Luc crawled to the bathroom and by some Herculean effort  
got to his feet. That was the last thing he did. With a final  
burst of unequalled agony an abrupt blackness engulfed him and  
he fell like a boneless mass to the hard tiled floor. The last  
sound in the room was as his head struck the floor with a devastating  
blow.

 

 

The discontent was palpable.  
"Delegate Uff, it's been half an hour. Does he expect us  
to just wait here for his grand entrance?"  
"Yes! Who does he think he is that he should keep us waiting  
like this."  
"This is an outrage! How dare that Earther do this to us!"  
Adopting Picard's tactic, Uff pounded his hands on the table.  
"Enough! You sound like a bunch of unruly children. I will  
go to his quarters....."  
"He's not answering his land activator."  
"As I was saying.....I will go to his quarters and you, Delegate  
Zu, will accompany me."  
The two delegates rose and left the room, leaving the other stunned  
delegates to their own devices. Uff and Zu quickly arrived at  
Jean-Luc's rooms and activated the chime. Receiving no answer,  
and not expecting one, Uff opened the door and stepped inside.  
"Picard.....Captain Picard."  
Uff looked about the room then made his way to the bathroom.  
Zu! Come here quickly!"  
Zu entered the room and gasped in dismay. Jean-Luc was sprawled  
on the floor, streams of blood from his head, nose and right ear  
had made their way to the central drain in the middle of the floor.  
Uff bent to turn the Captain over.  
"No! Don't move him! I know little about humans, but head  
injuries in any species should be treated with great care."  
"Then call your best healer Zu.....NOW!"  
Shaking his head, Zu, for the first time showed defiance.  
"No Uff. This is beyond both our technology and our knowledge  
of human physiology. Call his ship.......Quickly! Reach under  
him....gently... and get the badge from the front of his top."  
Very carefully, Uff slid his hand under Jean-Luc's chest and retrieved  
the communicator.  
"You press it and talk"  
"This is Uff calling the Enterprise."  
~ Enterprise here.~  
"Your Captain has been badly injured. We don't want to move  
him. Can you send help?"  
~Immediately Delegate Uff. Please wait at your present location.~  
Within moments Beverley Crusher and two assistants materialised  
in the bathroom. The doctor went to The Captain's side promptly  
and began to scan him with her tricorder.  
"How long has he been like this? Do you know what happened?"  
"I don't know either answer doctor. He was half an hour late  
for the afternoon sitting and wasn't answering his land activator,  
so Zu and I came to see him. We found him like this only moments  
ago. I can tell you however, he has been ill and in pain for some  
time.....in excess of sixteen days. I mentioned his changed colour  
and body mass, but he was reluctant to talk about it. He assured  
me he was all right. He had some medication here in his quarters.  
Shall I get it for you?"  
Not answering , Beverley gently opened one of Jean-Luc's eyes.  
Speaking to her assistants she said,  
"I need Tricordrazine, Perilan, two neural stimulators and  
a stasis support for the cervical region."  
As the med techs swung into action, Beverley looked up at Uff.  
"Yes Delegate, I would like to see his medication."  
Zu, who had moved to the doorway to afford everyone more room,  
now peered over Beverley's shoulder and cleared his throat.  
"I am a healer. How is he? Is there anything I can do?"  
Not taking her eyes off the Captain, Beverley brushed some errant  
strands of hair from her face.  
"No, there's nothing you can do, but thank you for the offer.  
He is in very bad shape. As soon as he's stabilised, we will take  
him to our ship. Adams.....his parthenogenic implant is beating  
irregularly. When we immobilise his head, I will turn him over.  
I want you to insert a bio-electrical regulator directly into  
the implant."  
"Understood doctor."  
"Madam here is the medication and applicator the Captain  
was using."  
Uff stood in the doorway, the loaded hypospray in his hands. Beverley,  
intently studying the tricorder said,  
"Give it to one of the med techs Delegate thank you. I've  
got his head in stasis, the cervical area is isolated. I'm going  
to turn him over now. I want this to be gentle and one continuous  
movement. Fledge, make sure the Captain's hips roll in one motion  
and keep his legs together. Ready? Go."  
As Beverley requested, the action was smooth and gentle. Beverley  
took a sharp breath when she saw Jean-Luc's face. Deathly pale  
and with dark smudges under his eyes, his weight loss made his  
patrician features look skeletal. One half of his face was covered  
in blood, the other half, the left side, sagged with no muscle  
tone at all. A vivid bruise could be seen on the right side, the  
eyebrow split open.  
With practised ease, Adams bared Jean-Luc's chest and inserted  
the regulator into the artificial heart.  
"Doctor I'm having trouble here. The regulator is not overcoming  
the irregular beat."  
Adjusting the tricorder, Beverley scanned the heart and frowned  
deeply.  
"There's organic damage around the implant. How the hell  
has this happened? Fledge draw some blood and get back to the  
ship. I want to know what's in his blood. Temapazine wouldn't  
do this. Adams we should be ready to transport the Captain in  
about ten minutes. I want you to beam up and get a surgical team  
together. Tell Dr. Selar this is a brain injury and ask Alyssa  
to come in, I will need her in surgery."  
Wasting no time, Fledge dematerialised to do his superior's bidding.  
Now there was more room, Uff and Zu moved closer to the Captain.  
"Delegates is there anything else you can tell me about the  
Captain's condition? What were his symptoms?"  
"I saw him this morning doctor. As I said, he was very pale  
and his body mass was reduced. Towards the end of our meeting,  
liquid came through his skin and his skin became an odd red colour.  
I think he was in great pain from his head and he closed his eyes.  
As our meeting concluded, his legs failed and he collapsed onto  
the floor. He insisted I was not to summon a healer and entreated  
me to help him back here. When we got here I found his medication  
and, as he was unable, I administered four doses."  
Beverley's head shot up.  
"Four doses?!"  
"Yes doctor. It seemed to help, but I think some pain and  
illness remained as he didn't recover completely. I told him of  
this afternoon's sitting and he said he would rest. I left and  
didn't return until I came here with Zu a little while ago, some  
five hours later. I do think he has been unwell for some time.  
Do humans often ignore their illnesses?  
Beverley slowly shook her head.  
" Only the stubborn ones. Thank you Delegate. I will be transporting  
to the ship now. I may want to talk with you again. Would that  
be acceptable?"  
"Of course. I hope the Captain recovers."  
Still on her knees beside the Captain, Beverley tenderly stroked  
his face.  
"So do I, Delegate. Enterprise, two to beam directly to sickbay."

 

 

 

"Selar! Set up a full neural scan. I'm going to  
see how Fledge is doing with the blood sample."  
After seeing the scan begin, Beverley made her way to the analysis  
module just as Fledge was activating the computer. She placed  
a hand on his shoulder and peered at the screen.  
"What have you got?"  
"I'm not certain doctor. There are three components here  
the computer is having trouble with. Generally, the solution is  
similar to Temapazine, very close in fact, but these....here,  
here and here.....It's as if the manufacturer made as close a  
match as possible and just missed."  
Beverley moved closer and put her finger on the screen.  
"Fledge, I want you to take these three mystery bags and  
open them up. I want to know exactly what they are and what they  
were doing to the Captain. Priority Fledge."  
She had left before he could reply. Approaching the biobed Beverley  
looked down at Jean-Luc.  
"How is he?"  
Dr. Selar replied,  
"The Captain's condition is grave. The scan shows a fracture  
running transversely over the right side of the cranium, causing  
haemorrhage through the nasal passage and the right aural canal.  
There is also paralysis down the left side, indicating an, as  
yet undisclosed, brain anomaly. Captain Picard's body temperature  
is at forty degrees and we are at present cooling and rehydrating  
him intravenously. He is profoundly unconscious and completely  
unresponsive to all stimuli."  
Beverley stood, absolutely motionless. She could feel the anguish,  
the terror, the despair beginning to creep over her. Her heart  
began to pound and tears welled in her eyes.  
*Oh God....not Jean-Luc....please, please, not my Jean-Luc.*  
"Doctor? Doctor Crusher! Are you all right?"  
Beverley flinched as if struck and realised how close she had  
come to losing herself to her despondency.  
"Yes Selar, I'm fine. It seems our next task is to find out  
what caused all this. The Captain has been experiencing pain for  
approximately sixteen days. From what I can gather, the pain increased  
rapidly....so much that Temapazine could no longer control it.  
He has an irregular heartbeat and had vision disturbances, as  
well as vomiting, and collapsed at least once. I want a 3D image  
built of his brain. Concentrate on the Cerebellum/Brainstem region."  
"Do you suspect something in particular Doctor Crusher?"  
Beverley frowned and softly brushed the back of her hand on Jean-Luc's  
cheek.  
"Just a hunch."  
"Beverley...."  
Looking to the doorway, Beverley spotted Will and Deanna and crossed  
the room to be with them.  
"How is he?"  
Leading them away she said over her shoulder,  
"You'd better come into my office."  
Once seated Beverley began to brief her fellow officers.  
"The Captain is profoundly unconscious and has suffered paralysis.  
The most likely cause is a brain anomaly of some kind, but we  
haven't found it yet. He has also been exposed to at least three  
unknown chemicals which I think have damaged his parthenogenic  
implant and possibly his vision. Will, I need you to find out  
how he got these chemicals. We think someone tried to produce  
Temapazine for him, but we don't know who, or what they did."  
"I'll get right on it Beverley, but tell me.....is he going  
to make it? Can you cure him?"  
A look of deep sadness crossed Beverley's face.  
"I honestly don't know Will, but by God I'll try my best."  
~Doctor Crusher, please report to Captain Picard's room.~  
Not bothering to say anything further, Beverley hastened from  
the office.  
"What have you got Selar?"  
"A granuloma. One centimetre in diameter, situated in the  
brainstem, in a canal involved in the fluid suspension. The granuloma  
has developed around one of two Borg implants deemed too deeply  
integrated to remove. Is this consistent with your "hunch"  
doctor?"  
"Yes Selar, it is."  
*No Jean-Luc, not this, I can't fix this.*  
"Bridge, this is Doctor Crusher. I want you to contact Starbase  
85\. Ask their CMO to track down Dr.Arok Xar. Message reads.....Contact  
Beverley Crusher immediately. Most urgent. ASAP, bridge. Crusher  
out."  
"Selar, what are the pain indicators showing?"  
The graceful Vulcan studied the readouts.  
"Morbidly high doctor, although I must point out there is  
a chance he cannot feel anything."  
"Let's hope so."

 

 

 

 

"Good afternoon Delegate Uff, thank you for seeing  
me."  
"Not at all, Commander Riker, not at all. Tell me, how is  
Captain Picard?"  
The two men crossed the courtyard and seated themselves under  
the shade of a large tree.  
"Gravely ill Sir. It's the Captain that brings me here.  
He had "borrowed" some pain killer medication when he  
last visited the ship and when that was exhausted, we believe  
he had some made here. Unfortunately, it wasn't an exact duplicate  
and there are some, as yet unidentified, chemicals causing the  
Captain some harm. We need to know what these chemicals are and  
to get that information, we need to find those people who aided  
the Captain. Please be assured, we are not seeking to punish anyone.  
There has been no wrong doing, from our point of view, but it  
is essential we find those responsible."  
Uff nodded his large head and moistened his scaly mouth.  
"I understand Commander. Actually, it should be fairly straightforward.  
There is only one clan suitably proficient in medical technology  
and I am on good terms with their delegate. We can talk to him  
now if you wish."  
Will stood, nodding his acceptance. The two men went directly  
to the conference anteroom, where several delegates were milling  
about, talking. Uff made his way straight to Zu.  
"Zu my friend. Could I have a moment of your time....in private?"  
In company, the three beings moved to another room nearby.  
"This is Commander Riker. He comes to us seeking information.  
Apparently some medication was ....replicated?, and there is a  
problem with it. He needs to find who did it. Who is your acromp?"  
"That would be Dyy. I will summon him."  
Turning to Will, Uff explained,  
"The acromps are a delegate's right arm. The delegates may  
be in charge, but it's the acromps who run the clans....or so  
they say."  
Will smiled.  
"There is a very old Earth saying about sergeants that is  
remarkably similar. It would seem we have more in common than  
we thought."  
"Indeed Commander. Ah, here they are."  
Zu introduced the acromp to Will.  
"I would like to begin by saying there's no one at fault  
here. We are not seeking to punish anyone, understood? Good. Do  
you know anything about the production of a painkiller for Captain  
Picard?"  
Dyy looked to Zu and received a nod of consent.  
"Yes Sir. An aide informed me that the Captain needed some  
medication replicated. I met with him and after ensuring it did  
not involve narcotics, I agreed to help him. He gave me a vial  
containing a small amount of liquid. He told me it was a synthesized  
painkiller and he required another full vial. I told him it would  
cost two strips of latinum and we agreed to meet later that night  
at his quarters."  
"And this took place as planned?"  
"Yes Sir. When I arrived at the Captain's billet he was very  
sick. His rooms were a shambles and he collapsed as he opened  
the door. I helped him to a chair and found the instrument that  
delivers the medication. I had to inject him three times before  
he got any relief....and even then, I don't think he recovered  
all that well. After that I left. Oh....and he paid me three strips...he  
is a kind man."  
Will smiled and nodded his head.  
"Tell me Dyy, do you keep a log....a record of all the replications  
that take place?"  
Dyy nodded eagerly.  
"Yes! Each machine has its own trace imprint. I can access  
a printout for you now, if you like."  
"That would be great Dyy. Thank you."  
As Dyy left, Will turned to the waiting delegates.  
"Hopefully we will be able to solve this mystery and help  
Captain Picard."  
Uff lowered his head and appeared to be deep in thought. Seeing  
that he was no longer required, Zu left to rejoin his companions.  
"He's a remarkable man, your Captain."  
"Yes, he is."  
"When I first came in contact with humans I was shocked at  
how......delicate.....you looked. Your skin is soft, your bones  
puny...Picard doesn't even have a head ruff! But rarely have I  
met a species so determined and resourceful, resolute. I think  
your people would make a formidable enemy Commander."  
Will straightened and looked Uff unflinchingly in the eye.  
"Hopefully, that will never come to pass, Delegate. How are  
the talks going?"  
"Out of respect for your Captain, the talks are suspended  
for the time being. Somehow I think more gets done in places like  
the anteroom than in a formal conference.....nothing to prove  
I suppose, no audience."  
"More similarities, Delegate. Although it was Starfleet that  
gave the Captain this mission, he thought it very worthwhile.  
He believed in what he was trying to achieve here."  
Uff turned and looked at a picture on the wall. It had been taken  
when the delegates first met, eighty years ago.  
"I've known him only a short while, but I agree with you.  
Perhaps he should give up being a Captain and become an ambassador."  
"Unlikely Sir, highly unlikely."  
Both men shared a companionable laugh. A soft knock at the door  
revealed Dyy, returning with the printout from the replicator.  
"Here you are Sir."  
"Thank you Dyy. If you gentlemen will excuse me I will return  
to the ship. Thank you again for your help."  
Will beamed up and Dyy turned pensively to Uff.  
"How can a species that wields so much power be so polite?"  
Uff just laughed.

 

 

 

 

Will had materialised in sickbay. Beverley was waiting  
for him.  
"Well how did you go?"  
"I've got a printout of the replication. It should give you  
the information you need."  
Taking the paper, Beverley went to a computer terminal and began  
tapping out instructions. Seeing he was no longer required, the  
Commander made his way into the Captain's room. He stood for sometime  
watching his commanding officer, feeling the anger of helplessness  
and the despair of seeing such a loved friend so gravely ill.  
*You look so small.....they're right, we do look delicate. Fight  
Captain, keep fighting and come back soon, we miss you.*  
It took eight and a half hours for the computer to finally identify  
the components of the unknown chemicals. Will had made two further  
trips planetside to query some healers about the effects and application  
of some of the chemicals, his answers helping Beverley to unravel  
the knot.  
Once she understood how the drugs affected Jean-Luc, she could  
counteract their effects.  
Within half an hour of the counter measures being administered,  
Jean-Luc's heart began beating regularly and his temperature started  
to return to a more normal reading. The skull fracture had been  
treated and with the help of an osteo-regenerator was almost fully  
repaired. Having eliminated some of his problems made Beverley  
feel much better, however she knew that Jean-Luc was desperately  
ill. While she had something to do in solving the mystery of the  
unknown chemicals Beverley could drive her worry to the back of  
her mind. Now it came surging forward. The Borg implants had been  
left in the Captain's brain because they were too deeply integrated  
into the brain tissue to be removed. They had been carefully monitored  
over the years and had not caused any trouble.....until now.  
*How long has this been troubling you Jean-Luc? Is this why you  
"forgot" you physicals? God, why didn't I just order  
you to attend!*  
~Beverley, we've received a reply from Starbase 85. Dr. Xar is  
on Premmal Four working on the Premman encephalitis outbreak.  
He's not able to contact you personally, but has indicated he  
is able to leave the planet if we can come for him. We can get  
there in two days at maximum warp.~  
"Do it Will. We need to get the Captain to him. He's the  
only one I think can help."  
After contacting Uff and outlining their plans, the Enterprise  
jumped to full warp on her mission to save her master. The next  
two days passed slowly for the medical staff, especially Beverley.  
The Captain was on full life support allowing his body to rest.  
In effect, machines had largely taken over, making the medical  
staff mostly redundant. All Beverley could do was be with him.  
She sat for long hours holding his hand and talking to him. There  
was of course, no response, not the slightest inkling that Jean-Luc  
could hear her, but, undaunted she persisted anyway. She loved  
this man....had done for a long time. Their relationship had only  
recently deepened....they had shared one beautiful evening making  
love, the next day bringing the orders for Jean-Luc to attend  
the conference. Since that time they had spent little time together.  
Now Beverley worried that they may have run out of time. And she  
had to admit....she was angry, very angry with him. He had lied  
to her, hidden his illness and compromised his well being by taking  
the Temapazine. Dedication to his job was one thing, deceiving  
the one you love was an entirely different thing. But...first  
things first. They had to get to Arok Xar. He was, at the present  
time, the leading neurologist in the Federation. If he couldn't  
help Jean-Luc, nobody could. So Beverley, like everyone else,  
just had to wait, and that was probably the hardest thing of all.

 

 

 

 

~Dr. Crusher, we are in orbit around Premmal IV. Dr.  
Xar is ready for transport.~  
"Thank you bridge."  
With haste, Beverley made her way to the transporter room and  
was on hand to meet Dr. Xar as he came aboard.  
"Dr. Xar, welcome to the Enterprise. I am Dr. Beverley Crusher,  
CMO. I wish this meeting was under better circumstances, I'm afraid  
I have a difficult case for you."  
Bowing graciously, the Bolian neurologist accepted Beverley's  
greeting and the two left for the sickbay.  
"I've studied the information you sent me. It is a difficult  
case indeed. For how long were the symptoms present?"  
"For the sixteen days the Captain was on the planet he had,  
at the very least, debilitating headaches leading eventually to  
his collapse. Other than that, well, let's just say Captain Picard  
is not exactly forthcoming where it concerns his health."  
Dr. Xar nodded sagely.  
"A common trait amongst Starfleet Captains. They like to  
think of themselves as indestructible."  
The doctors entered sickbay and went straight to Jean-Luc. Beverley  
called up onto a large viewscreen the 3D image of the Captain's  
brain.  
"As you can see Dr. Xar, the granuloma has formed around  
one of the two Borg implants in the upper brain stem. The suspension  
fluid is severely impeded in this area and we've established the  
presence of left side paralysis. The implants in this region were  
the largest that were left in the Captain's brain. There are microscopic  
filaments and several areas of nanite infiltration elsewhere but  
once Captain Picard's link to the Borg was severed, all the cybernetic  
technology ceased functioning. Until this incident, the Captain  
had experienced no ill health that could attributed to them, although  
during the "First Contact" event, the Captain reported  
"hearing" the Borg psychologically. We never found out  
how that occurred."  
Dr. Xar folded his arms and pursed his lips pensively.  
"Anti- rejection therapy?"  
"Difficult at best. As you know, Captain Picard has a parthenogenic  
cardiac implant. It was considered too precarious."  
Turning from the screen Dr. Xar looked down at the oblivious Captain.  
"He has been on life support for.....two days?"  
"Yes doctor."  
"Please, my given name is Arok."  
Beverley flushed slightly and smiled.  
"And I'm Beverley. When we got the Captain aboard he was  
bleeding from the nose and right ear. We discovered a skull fracture,  
obtained when his head hit the tiled floor as he collapsed. Captain  
Picard had "appropriated" some Temapazine to treat his  
headaches and when that ran out, he had the planet's healer clan  
replicate some more. Unfortunately, an exact copy wasn't possible,  
so the replicator computer produced chemicals as close to the  
original as it could. The result was chaotic. The Captain's bio-chemistry  
was compromised, resulting in high temperature, vision disturbance  
and a malfunctioning of his heart. All this has been rectified  
and since he was put on full life support, he has been stable,  
but profoundly unconscious."  
Picking up the PADD at the foot of Jean-Luc's biobed, Dr. Xar  
scrolled through the last hour's observations.  
"Well Beverley you seem to have done everything possible.  
I commend you and your staff. I think we should proceed as soon  
as possible and to that end I would like to go over the data again,  
then I think I'd better brief you and your surgery staff as to  
the procedure. Will you assist me?"  
"Thank you Arok, I would be honoured."  
Beverley showed the doctor to her office and made available all  
the data he required. She then announced a meeting with the senior  
staff to discuss the planned action. It was a very subdued group  
of officers who sat at the table.  
Geordie La Forge frowned, his blue ocular implants managing to  
convey his concern.  
"How good is Dr. Xar?"  
Beverley sat back and ran her hands through her hair.  
"The best in the Federation Geordie. We're very lucky to  
get him. Had a treatment for the encephalitis outbreak not been  
so promptly devised, he wouldn't have been able to leave Premmal  
IV."  
"Beverley....what's the prognosis? What about the paralysis?"  
"Will we won't know for some time. This situation is beyond  
my abilities. Since the Captain's assimilation our knowledge of  
Borg implants has increased immensely. Each time we encountered  
the Borg we learned more about them. Dr. Xar devoted himself to  
the study of Borg implants and, specifically, their removal. What  
was impossible years ago is now possible. What makes this so tricky  
is that an organic tumour has grown around the implant. How this  
affects the treatment is unknown at this time. We will know more  
once we expose it, until then.....I just don't know, but I can  
tell you....Captain Picard is in the best hands. If Arok Xar can't  
help him, no one can."  
The meeting broke up and the officers drifted back to their stations  
lost in thought. Beverley went back to sickbay and took her seat  
next to Jean-Luc. Taking his hand in hers she felt tears pricking  
her eyes.  
"Come back to me Jean-Luc......I love you."  
Fat tears spilled over her lids and coursed slowly down her face.  
Sometime later Beverley became aware of someone else in the room.  
She hurriedly wiped her face and turned to face the visitor.  
"Arok.....please excuse me."  
"Not at all Beverley."  
The doctors stood silently for a few moments, each lost in their  
own thoughts.  
"You and the Captain.....you're....."  
"Yes. We've been friends for thirty years or so. It's only  
recently that we...well, you know. I try, I want to be detached  
about all this, but it sneaks up on me. If he.....if we can't....."  
Arok placed a gentle hand on her shoulder.  
"We'll do our best Beverley. Have a little faith in him.  
From what I can gather, he's a very strong individual. He won't  
give up, neither should you."  
Soon after, things became very busy. Jean-Luc was prepared for  
surgery, the doctors and staff familiarising themselves with the  
procedure.  
It was over five hours later that Beverley again found herself  
by Jean-Luc's bed, holding his hand. He looked dreadful. His complexion  
sallow, he had dark smudges under his eyes, his weight loss giving  
his usually handsome face a skeletal appearance. About his head  
glowed the light blue of the regen field, his right forearm connected  
to an intravenous feeder and his lower regions attached to a bio-waste  
unit.  
The footfalls, though soft, Beverley recognised as Will's.  
"How is he?"  
"Remarkably well, considering."  
Will carefully placed his hands on Beverley's shoulders and began  
a gentle massage.  
"Tell me."  
"Dr. Xar accessed the tumour relatively easily and the granuloma  
was removed, although it took some of the most delicate work I've  
ever seen. Once the implant was freed he assessed the risk and  
it was decided to remove both that implant and the one nearby.  
Two years ago we wouldn't have even contemplated it. Gods Will,  
Arok's good. I learned more today than I could believe possible.  
There has been some damage to the surrounding brain tissue, however...."  
"Beverley, you just said "brain" and "damage"  
in the same sentence. I don't like the sound of that."  
Beverley sighed and rolled her head, reaching up to clasp Will's  
hands.  
"Will he's not out of the woods yet. We are optimistic that  
the damage will right itself. You'd be surprised how resilient  
the brain is. Now that the tumour and the implants have been removed  
there is every chance that the Captain will make a full recovery...."  
Will leaned down to Beverley's ear and said quietly,  
"I hear a "but"."  
"But....it won't be easy. The paralysis will abate but he  
will have to work damn hard. There will be therapy... which he'll  
hate. There will be post-operative pain....headaches, nausea.  
There will be loss of sensation in some areas....should I continue?"  
Turning Beverley on the chair Will looked at her tired face.  
"If there's one thing I've learned on this ship it's that  
we're family. I know how difficult he can be and I also know how  
stubborn we can be when it comes to looking after him. He will  
hate every moment of his recovery, but we'll be with him each  
step of the way. We will be there for him....and you."  
"Beverley, I know it's none of my business, but are you and  
the Captain.....have you two become...."  
"Yes Will. The day before he was ordered to negotiate at  
the conference."  
Will's smile was contagious.  
"About time! You know, it was excruciating to watch you two  
all these years. It was so obvious you were meant for each other."  
They both shared a gentle laugh.  
"When will he wake?"  
Beverley turned and gazed lovingly at Jean-Luc.  
"In a few hours."  
"Then why don't you come to the forward lounge and have dinner  
with Deanna and me, get a little rest, then come back to be here  
when he comes to. I'm sure your staff can handle things for a  
while."  
"I'd really like to argue with you Commander.....however....you're  
on."  
After checking the read outs yet again, Beverley informed her  
staff of her plans, then left sickbay. On Will's suggestion, They  
dropped by Dr. Xar's quarters then the three of them met Deanna  
in the forward lounge and had the promised dinner. Beverley left  
soon after she had eaten and made her way to her cabin, indulging  
in a long hot water shower. Sonic showers did a good job of cleaning,  
but nothing could beat a water shower for relaxation.  
After checking on Jean-Luc's condition and taking a cup of lemon  
tea, she settled into her sofa to collect her thoughts.  
Will was right, they did belong together. All those years dancing  
on the head of a pin, denying their true feelings, ignoring the  
desire and all they accomplished was to waste precious time. Now  
they had finally tasted each other.....so sweetly......the words  
almost screeched. Why did we wait so long!  
And now. What she had long feared.....giving herself to this man,  
admitting she was incomplete without him, dreading the one thing  
that was so intolerable, that he would be brought into sickbay  
and she be unable to save him had happened.  
And what went before. He had not come to her when he needed to.  
Did he not trust her? Why would he rather treat himself than disclose  
his illness? Where was truth? Where was trust? She, more than  
any other, knew this man. Knew his strengths....and his faults.  
Knew how single minded, how stubborn, how intractable he could  
be. But what of all the whispered endearments? The promises. The  
hopes. Where were all these things when he took the Temapazine?  
When she saw him on the planet? The hurt went deep inside, in  
a place she thought she would never allow another to see, and  
she didn't know what to do about it. Beverley felt the welling  
of her eyes and shook her head angrily.  
*Not now!*  
In quick, agitated movements, she disposed of her cup and left  
her quarters.

 

 

 

 

 

The first thing Jean-Luc became aware of was the pain in  
his head. It pounded in a throbbing rhythm in sync with his heart.  
With each stroke of his pulse nausea increased until he knew with  
certainty that he was going to vomit. Just as the abdominal spasm  
started he heard the soft hiss of a hypospray and the pain and  
nausea receded.  
He lay quietly, trying to order his thoughts.  
*Where am I? I can't remember! What happened to me? Where....*  
Jean-Luc felt the panic begin to rise and quelled it savagely.  
*Think! Where was I? My room! My room on the planet. I .....I.....was  
in bed, the headache, bad....vomiting....hot.....my heart! Something  
was wrong with my heart and I got up and....and.... Dammit! What  
did I do?*  
"Then he heard her voice and calmed immediately.  
"Jean-Luc? It's Beverley. I'm holding your right hand. Squeeze  
my hand to answer. Can you hear me?"  
A Squeeze.  
"Is the pain gone?"  
A squeeze.  
"Has the nausea settled?"  
A squeeze.  
"Good. You're on the Enterprise and you've been very sick,  
but you're going to be all right. Rest now, we'll talk later."  
There was much he needed to ask, to say and as he drifted back  
to sleep his thoughts focused on Beverley.  
*Don't go Beverley.....stay with me.....I need you.*  
The next time he became aware, it was to hear Alyssa Ogowa say  
to Dr. Crusher,  
"The swelling had decreased 0.5% in the last hour. He's making  
good progress."  
"Hmmmm. Dr. Xar will be here in a few minutes Alyssa. Could  
you run another Estirac series and compare them to this morning's?  
I think Dr. Xar will want a comparison."  
"Yes, Doctor."  
Jean-Luc tried to speak but something was wrong with his face.  
It felt odd and he couldn't make any sound. Instead he attempted  
to move his right hand and felt satisfied when his efforts set  
of alarms on the bio-panel.  
"So.....you're awake. Let's see if you can open those eyes."  
Jean-Luc felt a soft, wet pad wipe his eyes, making it easier  
to open them. His right eye opened but his left refused. It didn't  
matter though as the first thing he saw was Beverley. Meaning  
to smile, he failed miserably, only the right side of his face  
would obey his command turning his smile into a grimace.  
He tried to speak again, and again, failed.  
Leaving to collect a tumbler of water, Beverley filled it, obtained  
a straw and returned to the Captain.  
"Here, try this."  
Helping him to roll to his right side and holding his shoulder,  
Beverley placed the straw in the right corner of Jean-Luc's mouth.  
He sucked gently and was rewarded with the cool liquid filling  
his mouth. He sighed with pleasure. Taking a washer, Beverley  
carefully wiped away the water that had escaped from the left  
side of his mouth. The effort quickly tired the Captain, Beverley  
having to ease him back on the bed.  
"Better?"  
Jean-Luc nodded. With difficulty he said,  
"What's wrong with me?"  
Beverley pulled over a chair and sat down. Reaching over to Jean-Luc,  
she gently stroked his face.  
"You've been very sick Jean-Luc. You had a tumour around  
one of the Borg implants in your brain stem. That's what caused  
the headaches. We managed to get you to the leading doctor in  
the neurological field....you were very lucky. He removed the  
tumour and the Borg implants and you should make a complete recovery,  
but you have....for the time being.....a left side paralysis."  
Seeing the look of alarm on Jean-Luc's face made Beverley stand  
and hold his shoulders.  
"It's all right Jean-Luc! It will pass. You will have some  
physical therapy to do and you will suffer headaches for a while,  
but we can treat those as the arise. It's all right....you will  
recover."  
Jean-Luc sighed and Beverley was shocked to see tears sliding  
down his face. Sitting on the bed, Beverley gathered him in her  
arms.  
"Shhh Jean-Luc. It's over now. You'll get better soon, I  
promise, I promise."  
She held him until he slept.

 

 

 

Jean-Luc lay on the bed quietly fuming. Oh, how  
he hated this.  
"Now remember Captain, inhale as your knee comes up, and  
exhale as it goes down. Hold the bed rail with your right hand  
and I will slip the restraint on your left."  
"Alrighty then! Are we ready?"  
The Captain grunted his reply, gritted his teeth and slowly inhaled  
as his knee rose to touch his chest. He felt the muscles in his  
jaw creak with strain as he took the weight when his leg was lowered.  
"Very Good Captain! Two more and we'll move on to your arm."  
"For pity's sake woman, when can I rest! I've done twenty  
five damn lifts and I'm tired!"  
The woman sniffed daintily.  
"We are a little testy today aren't we. I see your speech  
has improved. Let's see if you can put the same effort into these  
last two leg lifts."  
Picard glared his best withering look and, as usual, it had absolutely  
no effect. His tormentor, Nurse Eisenberg, just smiled sweetly,  
raised her eyebrows and waited.  
"When you're ready Captain."  
Beverley stood in the doorway watching the by-play. She was behind  
Jean-Luc and she sent a wink to the harried nurse. When the final  
two lifts were completed, Beverley came into the room.  
"Thank you Michele, I'll help the Captain with the arm lifts.  
I can see he's somewhat sour today."  
"Yes doctor. I'll see you this afternoon Sir."  
Another grunt was her only reply.  
"Jean-Luc really. Do you have to take your bad temper out  
on my staff? Nurse Eisenberg was only doing her job."  
"Hurrumph! I didn't know the works of the Marquis De Sade  
were required reading for nursing personnel."  
Beverley was incensed.  
"Now you look here! Michele Eisenberg is a highly trained,  
dedicated and motivated nurse who shows patience beyond the norm  
when dealing with irascible grumps like you! Do you honestly think  
she enjoys putting you through this discomfort? There are other  
people in this sickbay needing our.......Jean-Luc?"  
The Captain looked defeated. His head sank and his hand came up  
to his temple. In a soft voice he said,  
"I'm sorry Beverley. I will apologise to nurse Eisenberg  
later. It's just that I get so tired."  
"Your head is hurting isn't it."  
All he could do is slowly nod. In a whisper he said,  
"Yes."  
Beverley left the room and returned a short while later with a  
hypospray which she pressed to Jean-Luc's neck. The soft hiss  
was followed immediately after by relief. Taking a big breath,  
Jean-Luc faced Beverley.  
"Thank you."  
Jean-Luc.....why don't you tell me when you're in pain? It's not  
a contest you know. There's no prize for the bravest patient.  
If you don't tell me, things get out of hand, like what happened  
with Michele. If you had only come to me when you first started  
to get the headaches......"  
"I did."  
"What? When!"  
Jean-Luc took her hands in his.  
"I came aboard to see you, but when I got to sick bay you  
weren't there."  
"So you took the hypospray and left. You didn't contact me....ask  
where I was, you just took matters into your own hands and completely  
shut me out! Jean-Luc....there is so much wrong with that....I  
don't know where to start. Am I your doctor or not? And as for  
our relationship.....what about trust? I though we had started  
something wonderful, something we could share....apparently not!  
You would rather go behind my back, steal medical equipment and  
drugs to treat yourself. You couldn't come to me? What does that  
tell you? You hurt me Jean-Luc, you hurt me so deeply I don't  
know if it will heal!"  
By this time Beverley was standing rigidly beside the bed, her  
voice raised.  
"And if you think you can just gloss over this with protestations  
of nobly completing the mission, you can forget it! It won't wash  
with me!"  
With that she stormed out of his room and out of sickbay leaving  
Jean-Luc stunned, sitting alone on his bed.

 

 

 

 

The next five days passed slowly for Jean-Luc. The  
therapy progressed, three times a day, and the Captain, after  
a major attitude adjustment, threw himself into his exercises  
and improved rapidly. He even formed a friendship with Michele....Beverley  
was right....she was a delightful person, dedicated and compassionate  
and Jean-Luc came to realise how lucky he was to have use of her  
expertise. Dr. Xar had been dropped off at Starbase 85, pleased  
with his patient's recovery, and the mighty starship was on her  
way back to the conference. Jean-Luc had been spending a lot of  
time thinking about Beverley and how to repair the damage he had  
caused. It worried him that he may not be able to close the breach  
and he didn't quite know what to do. After consultation with Will,  
it was decided that the Captain would resume the talks at the  
conference. It was a sound decision, given the delegates' respect  
for the Captain, and the officers hoped the delegates would agree  
to meet on the Enterprise. Of course this did not sit well with  
Beverley, yet another bone of contention. Picard had much to think  
about as they streaked towards their destination. It had been  
ten days since his collapse.

 

 

 

 

  
"I don't agree Captain. It's too soon....you're not  
yet fully recovered, there may be complications."  
"Doctor......Beverley, I'm sure I'll be all right. We can  
use the medical conference room and you can check on me as often  
as you like. I will even allow you to set the time constraints.  
Please Beverley. This is very important......to them....and to  
me."  
Beverley looked long and hard at Jean-Luc. She was still angry  
and hurt, but she realised she couldn't use her emotions as a  
reason for not allowing Jean-Luc to continue with the negotiations.  
"All right Captain. I will examine you morning, midday and  
evening. No session is to run for more that two and a half hours  
and you will stop all together if I say so."  
"But Beverley...."  
"Take it or leave it."  
Beverley's coldness was worrying Jean-Luc. He had not found the  
time to talk to her privately, a situation not helped by the doctor's  
avoidance of him, and he still did not know how he was going to  
mend the rift. He desperately wanted to assuage the hurt he had  
caused. He loved Beverley deeply, but found the circumstances  
almost beyond his power to deal with. It was an irony that one  
of the Federation's most distinguished Captains, one of its best  
diplomats , could be so stumped by matters of the heart.  
Just then the doors opened to reveal a grinning Will Riker. Seeing  
his approach, Beverley returned to the main sickbay.  
"We're on Captain. The delegates have agreed to meet here  
on the Enterprise."  
"Grand Number One. Will you see to of the arrangements?"  
Smiling, Will nodded.  
"Of course Sir. Captain there's one thing....Delegate Uff  
has requested a private meeting with you before the conference  
starts. I told him it may not be possible but he was very keen."  
Picard looked pensive.  
"I have no objection Will, but it will have to be cleared  
by Beverley. I'll ask her now, then you can give Uff his answer."  
The two men found Beverley in the analysis lab, running a scan  
on a sample of fluid.  
"Beverley, the delegates have agreed to meet on board, but  
Delegate Uff has requested a private meeting with me first. I  
think it could be important, however, I will abide by your ruling."  
Without looking up Beverley muttered,  
"You're pushing your luck Captain."  
Jean-Luc remained silent. Will stared fixedly at his feet. Turning  
to the waiting men, Beverley sighed.  
"Ok Captain. You keep it short and if you develop so much  
as a blush, the talks stop immediately."  
Jean-Luc maintained eye contact with Beverley for some seconds  
then nodded and left abruptly. Will was pained to see his two  
dear friends so obviously at loggerheads.  
"Beverley don't you think he...."  
"Can it Commander! I'm not interested."  
Jean-Luc showered, shaved and donned a fresh uniform. He was waiting  
in the conference room when Uff was shown in.

 

"Delegate Uff, welcome aboard the Enterprise."  
"Thank you Captain. I trust you are recovered?"  
Gesturing to some seats, Jean-Luc smiled.  
"Yes Delegate. I am well thank you. Tell me, what brings  
you here?"  
Uff adopted a curious pose that Jean-Luc had discovered indicated  
deep thought.  
"I have thought long and hard about what you said Captain  
Picard, but I before I give you my decision I must ask you.....where  
did you find out about her?"  
"I take it you're referring to your mother?"  
Uff raised his chin and gave a curt nod.  
"Your mother's acromp was very devoted to her. It was Naa  
who helped conceal the pregnancy and aided your mother at your  
birth and it was Naa who convinced Prou to contact your father.  
She had chronicled everything and when your mother died she contacted  
your father and together they seeded the records with all the  
facts. It was an entry of your father's that led me to Prou's  
history. It's another facet of your people Uff. They care enough  
to record each person's history. An admirable trait."  
Uff pushed his arms upon the polished surface of the table, stretching  
his three clawed fingers.  
"Quite an investigator, aren't you? I must admit, I was incensed  
when you confronted me with all this. Knowing it and having.....if  
you will excuse the expression......an alien, throw it at my face.....I  
didn't know quite what to do. It's a difficult thing, to be reminded  
how fallible one is, just when one thinks one was top of the  
heap."  
Jean-Luc smiled sardonically and sat back in his chair.  
"There are a few of my officers....trusted friends.....who  
take delight in reminding me constantly."  
Both men shared a companionable chuckle. Uff tilted his head and  
snorted, a gesture Jean-Luc knew to be positive.  
"Well, our frailties aside, I find that I agree with you.  
It's time we put the bad times behind us. I will wear my shame  
as a beacon to my people. I dare say it will be a shock.......resilience  
is also an admirable trait, is it not Captain?  
Jean-Luc looked with open admiration upon Uff. Delegate, you are  
doing a wonderful thing. In time, history will remember your wisdom."  
"I think your obstinacy may be mentioned also Captain. Now!  
Are you prepared for the squabbling that is sure to commence?"  
"I am indeed. With the prize such a rich one....it will be  
almost a pleasure....almost."

 

 

 

Squabbling was putting it mildly. Once the delegates  
realised the unification was a certainty, the battle for the allocation  
of resources and positions were fierce. It took many repetitions  
of the words...."This is for ALL the people" before  
in slowly dawned on the delegates that they were negotiating for  
each and every citizen...as a united people. The corps of delegates  
became the first Parliament and Jean-Luc breathed a sigh of relief  
when Delegate Uff became the first Prime Minister.  
To her credit, Beverley had been discreet in her management of  
the Captain's health. However, on the third day she was convinced  
to order him to rest. To that end, Jean-Luc and Uff met one final  
time and it was decided the Captain was no longer required. The  
delegates had to start out on their own and this was as good a  
time as any. Jean-Luc had every confidence in them, although he  
felt a pang of discontent at not seeing the process through to  
the end. He was assured he would be welcome to return at any time  
and was content with that.

 

 

 

"So Beverley, I take it I'm still off duty?"  
Beverley gave him a look of disinterest. Snapping her tricorder  
closed she moved to the bench.  
"I'm surprised you asked. You're still obviously below par."  
Jean-Luc sighed exasperatedly.  
"It was a joke Beverley. You remember how it goes.....someone  
tells a joke....you laugh. We used to share a lot of jokes."  
"Share? Did you say share? I was unaware you knew the meaning  
of the word."  
"Oh Beverley enough! How long are you going to keep this  
up? What can I do.....what do you *want* me to do? For God's sake  
tell me because I'm sure I don't know!"  
Beverley was incensed. Throwing her tricorder across the room  
she shouted...  
"That's just it isn't it? You don't like my behaviour and  
you want to know how long it will go on for? Is that your only  
concern? How about....I'm sorry I hurt you so much Beverley. I  
was wrong Beverley. My actions were reprehensible Beverley."  
Jean-Luc's hazel eyes glittered dangerously. In a very quiet voice  
he said,  
"I've already apologised and I've explained my actions to  
you *and* Starfleet. I'm not ashamed of what I did....it was necessary  
at the time. If you do not accept my apology.....well I don't  
see that as my problem."  
Beverley stood, rooted to the spot, her anger making her almost  
inarticulate.  
"You arrogant son-of -a....."  
"Doctor Crusher! That is enough!"  
Not believing her ears, Beverley straightened to attention.  
"Yes Sir!"  
She turned on her heel and made toward the door.  
"Beverley....."  
The doors parted and she left the room without a backwards glance.

 

 

Jean-Luc paced in his cabin like a caged animal. He prowled,  
muttering to himself .  
"That woman! How dare she call me...."  
The sound of his door chime stopped him in his tracks. He stood  
motionless, glaring at the door. The chime rang again.  
"Who the hell is it!?"  
"It's Deanna Captain."  
The Captain lowered his head and closed his eyes.  
"I would rather not see anyone at this time Counsellor."  
"Captain, I can feel you distress two decks away. Please  
let me come in."  
Jean-Luc sighed at the inevitability of her gesture.  
"Very well Counsellor."  
Deanna noted the subdued lighting and the way the Captain was  
absently rubbing his temple.  
"Captain....you have a headache."  
"It's nothing Counsellor. I'm a little ah, stressed at the  
moment. I'm sure it's due to that."  
"Would you like to talk about it?'  
Jean-Luc sat heavily on his couch and leaned his head back.  
"No.....yes.....oh God, I honestly don't know."  
Deanna moved to his side and sat with him Taking one of his hands  
she said gently,  
"Captain...."  
"I don't know what to do. The though of loosing her....I  
can't bear.....Tell me Deanna, how do I fix this? How do I heal  
this gaping hole?"  
Deanna let go of the Captain's hand and folded her hands in her  
lap.  
"Captain, why did you avoid Beverley? Why didn't you tell  
her you were unwell?"  
Jean-Luc leaned forward and placed his elbows on his knees, cradling  
his head in his hands.  
"I had been to the ship a few times and Beverley had badgered  
me about my condition, you know, the usual things.....Are you  
eating?...Are you getting enough sleep?. Quite frankly, it annoyed  
me and I decided I wouldn't come back to the ship."  
"You had the headaches then?"  
"Yes, but they weren't bad....more of an inconvenience than  
anything."  
"But that changed."  
Jean-Luc nodded tiredly.  
"Yes. It became worse, much worse, so much so that I was  
forced to come up to the ship. I beamed to my cabin....I don't  
know why....perhaps I was hiding. Anyway I left immediately for  
sickbay, but when I got there, Beverley was gone. It was very  
busy... I was going to wait, really, then I saw the hypospray.  
It was just sitting there on the bench. I picked it up, fiddling...passing  
time, you know, then I looked at the vial and saw it was Temapazine.  
I knew what it was and it occurred to me almost instantly....take  
it and treat yourself. It's only a headache after all. I didn't  
think it would be missed....it seems I didn't think too well at  
all."  
A short silence was endured between the two officers.  
"What happened then?"  
"The drug worked well initially, but I found it required  
more, then more still, to stop the pain. The talks had reached  
a critical phase....balanced on a knife edge. I had discovered  
important information about delegate Uff and I needed desperately  
to talk privately with him. By this time the vial was nearly empty  
and I knew if Beverley had seen me she would've instantly had  
me confined to sickbay, so I couldn't go back to the ship. I had  
the Temapazine replicated on the planet and continued to use it  
with lessening effect."  
Deanna rested a hand on Jean-Luc's knee.  
"Beverley came down to see you."  
"Uh huh. By this time it had been worked out that it was  
me who had taken the hypospray. When she came down the headaches  
weren't too bad and I looked much the same as the last time she  
had seen me, the Temapazine was still working then. She tried  
to ask me.....I deflected her question and then I was contacted  
by the delegates. I was running a little late and I used that  
as an excuse to leave."  
"You have reported your actions to Starfleet?"  
"Yes. My behaviour was less than correct, although I stand  
by my actions. I felt it was the right thing to do for the mission.  
As it turned out, the information I had about Uff changed everything.  
I don't think we could've succeeded if I hadn't persevered. He  
trusted me."  
"Captain, Beverley feels you betrayed her. You have hurt  
her very deeply."  
Jean-Luc looked sharply at the counsellor.  
"You've spoken with her?"  
"Yes."  
"What can I do?"  
Deanna placed both her hands on her knees and gently rubbed them  
up and down her thighs.  
"Have you explained all this to Beverley as you just explained  
it to me?"  
"Well no. Since I regained consciousness she has been increasingly  
remote, and after this afternoon...."  
Deanna was deep in thought.  
"Captain....I think you need to talk to her as you've just  
spoken to me. Calm and quiet. We both know how acerbic she can  
be, but you'll have to ignore it. Invite her to dinner and if  
she comes.....work very hard at being calm. You know her well.  
If you can avoid her anger, you may get the opportunity to explain  
yourself. Then Captain you must apologise....for the hurt, the  
betrayal...everything. Can you do that? Is she worth it?"  
Jean-Luc appeared close to tears.  
"Oh yes Counsellor, she is."

 

 

 

Beverley was totally immersed in her work when Jean-Luc  
entered her office. It took some moments before she became aware  
of his presence. Staring coldly she said,  
"Yes Captain?"  
Jean-Luc lowered his head and sighed.  
"I have a headache doctor, however I see you're busy. I will  
see someone else."  
"No! I mean....that's not necessary."  
Regaining her composure, Beverley led the Captain to a quiet room  
and motioned for him to sit on the biobed. She retrieved a tricorder  
and scanned his head.  
"How long have you had it?"  
"Oh... a few hours. It wasn't too bad at first, then it started  
to get worse so.....here I am."  
"Hmmm. It would've been better if you had've come earlier,  
however, I'm thankful for small mercies."  
The Captain curbed the retort that was on his lips and said nothing.  
Finishing the scan Beverley put away the tricorder.  
"Stress. This should fix it."  
She took a hypospray from a draw and applied it to Jean-Luc's  
neck. The relief was immediate.  
He closed his eyes and said softly...  
"Thank you."  
Beverley looked at her friend, noting how tired and frail he had  
become. She knew by now of the success of the mission and she  
was now realising the toll it had taken on the Captain.  
Hey....Jean-Luc.....anytime, ok? If you need me, I'm here, always."  
"You haven't called me that for a while....too long."  
"What..... Jean-Luc? Yeah well, I've been busy being angry  
with you."  
Jean-Luc looked at Beverley, his expression completely open.  
"And now?"  
It was Beverley's turn to lower her head.  
"The jury's still out."  
Very carefully, Jean-Luc took Beverley's hands in his. He revelled  
in her warmth, her delicate hands looking so snug in his large  
ones.  
"Beverley, would you do me the honour of having dinner with  
me?......Please?"  
Her head still lowered, Beverley felt a blush rise to her cheeks.  
Finding the courage, she raised her face and what she saw took  
her breath away. Jean-Luc's face was completely naked. Tears welled  
in his eyes and the hope that shone through their hazel depths  
squeezed her heart. Struggling to contain her own emotions she  
said,  
"Yes Jean-Luc, yes I will."  
It took a moment for the Captain to gather himself.  
"Thank you Beverley.....I seem to be saying that a lot lately  
don't I?"  
They both shared a gentle laugh then Jean-Luc raised his hand  
and gently trailed his fingers down Beverley's face.  
"Shall I pick you up at....say eight thirty?"  
"That would be fine."  
The rest of the afternoon passed in a dream for Beverley. She  
felt so young, as if she were going on a first date. Once her  
shift had ended she hurried to her quarters. She knew she had  
ample time, the Captain wasn't due for some hours, but the doctor  
wanted everything to be perfect. After running a luxurious hot  
bath, she added some exotic scented bath crystals she had picked  
up from Eptas 3, a planet whose inhabitants were known for their  
sensuality. She had been told the crystals would impart a delicious  
scent to her skin, making her irresistible to males of almost  
any species. Beverley had owned the crystals for five years and  
had never used them. She hoped they would still work.

 

 

 

 

 

Jean-Luc was similarly engaged. He started by thoroughly  
cleaning his quarters. It wasn't necessary, his quarters would've  
been the cleanest and tidiest on the ship, but he felt he should  
make the effort. It was important. Next he replicated candles  
of varied colour and size. Floating, standing, wax and other alien  
varieties, some scented and some chosen simply for their beauty.  
He placed them right throughout his cabin, hesitating only when  
he came to his bedroom. Should he? Would it appear presumptuous?  
In the end he decided against it. He wanted to court Beverley  
and if that meant he had to wait to taste her again, well, so  
be it. He was determined to win her trust and he would let her  
know that what had occurred would not happen again.......if she  
would only give him the chance.  
The menu was next and after careful consideration, he decided  
on something elegantly simple. In keeping with the meal, he chose  
a beautiful centrepiece for the table then stepped back to view  
the effect. Satisfied, he considered, then rejected several musical  
pieces, finally settling on some soft jazz, a favourite of Beverley's.  
He was surprised to find himself somewhat fatigued, it irritated  
him somehow, but he acquiesced, and after setting the alarm, stretched  
out on his bed and soon fell asleep.

 

 

 

 

Beverley also dozed. It had been a long day and the  
emotional storm her difficulties with the Captain had caused had  
put her under considerable strain. It was the rapidly cooling  
water that finally woke her. For a moment she was confused, then  
quickly remembered her date. As she got out of the bath she smelled  
the fragrance the crystals had imparted and grinning wickedly  
she thought,  
*I hope it works.*  
She spent some time on her hair....getting it just so.....then  
devoting an equal effort on her makeup. Not too much....just enough.  
She was running her hands down the length of her dress when the  
door chime sounded. She jumped involuntarily, her heart missing  
a beat then settling into a fast rhythm. Moving to the door, she  
took a deep breath and pressed the opening button.  
Jean-Luc stood very still and stared. His breath had left him  
and his heart had taken to beating rapidly. She was beautiful....stunning  
in fact. Her hair piled up with curling wisps hanging down, framing  
her exquisite face. Surely she was the most beautiful woman he  
had ever seen. The sapphire blue dress, the low neckline showing  
the creamy skin of her cleavage, hugging her lithe body....her  
blue eyes.....he was lost and all he could do was stand there  
and stare.  
Beverley was similarly afflicted. The Captain stood before her  
dressed in a black dinner suit, white shirt, black studs and black  
bow tie. He was so elegant, so dashing....his extraordinary hazel  
eyes, so often appearing to be different colours, catching the  
light and glittering and in his hands a sheaf of gorgeous long  
stemmed red roses.  
Beverley found her voice first.  
"Are they for me?"  
"What? Oh yes! Forgive me.....you have me somewhat distracted.  
Beverley, you look beautiful."  
Gently blushing and feeling wonderful for it, Beverley laughed,  
her lovely eyes sparkling.  
"Thank you Jean-Luc. You cut quite a figure yourself. Shall  
I put the roses in a vase?"  
"If you like."  
Jean-Luc was delighted to watch Beverley performing the simple  
task of retrieving a vase and arranging the flowers. Her effect  
on him was so powerful, he felt almost a voyeur, entranced by  
her beauty and grace.  
When she was finished she moved to stand in front of him.  
"All finished."  
Offering his arm, Jean-Luc said,  
"Shall we?"  
They left Beverley's cabin and took the short walk to his, Jean-Luc  
feeling so proud to have her on his arm.  
Upon entering, Beverley stopped and gasped with pleasure.  
"Jean-Luc! It's so beautiful.....and the fragrance...so subtle."  
She turned to face him and ran her hands up his chest to his shoulders.  
"Thank you Jean-Luc, it's wonderful."  
He leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead.  
"Hungry?"  
"Mmmm."  
Jean-Luc escorted Beverley to the table and presented her with  
a glass of chilled white wine and first course, a lightly sauteed  
vegetable dish Beverley was sure she'd never had before. This  
was followed by a raw fish and flower meal that Jean-Luc explained  
he had first tried some years ago on a distant planet. He was  
so taken with the dish, he had brought some on board and programmed  
the computer to replicate it. Dessert was a light lemon sorbet,  
cold and cleansing. In all, the meal was delightful. Filling,  
but not heavy. The conversation had been friendly and inconsequential,  
interspersed with gentle laughter.  
"Would you like some coffee, or a chamomile tea perhaps?"  
Smiling up at her handsome date Beverley said,  
"That would be lovely. Tea please."  
While the Captain secured the drinks, Beverley went and sat on  
the sofa in the living area. The candles cast their subdued light,  
creating a feeling of quiet peace.  
Jean-Luc sat beside her, placing the drinks on the low table.  
"The meal was wonderful Jean-Luc, thank you. You obviously  
put a lot of thought into it."  
"Well, you know.....I wanted to.....I wanted you to...."  
Jean-Luc stopped speaking and lifted his hand to Beverley's face.  
In a voice thick with emotion he said softly,  
"I'm so sorry Beverley. I'm sorry for the hurt I caused,  
I'm sorry I didn't trust you, I'm..."  
He couldn't continue. Closing his eyes, two tears made their way  
down his face and he bowed his slowly shaking head in shame.  
Beverley gently cupped his chin and raised his head to face her.  
"Jean-Luc, if we are to go forward, we have to clear this  
up. If we don't establish some sort of ground rules....this will  
only happen again. I know how seriously you take your duty and  
I also know how you hate to give up, but sometimes you just have  
to ask for help! It's not a failing to get sick you know."  
A small smile took the sting out of her words. Jean-Luc wiped  
his face and returned her smile.  
"I know Beverley, but when I came on board you assailed me  
about my health."  
The doctor began to speak, but Jean-Luc touched her lips with  
his fingers.  
"No....let me finish...please. We need to get this all out  
in the open. No more avoiding the truth, agreed?"  
Beverley nodded, frowning.  
"What I did was wrong....no argument. As my doctor, my CMO,  
you had a right to know I was ill. I betrayed your trust.....  
your love, my behaviour was unforgivable and, again, I apologise.  
But there are times when the mission is more important than my  
health. Beverley the people I was sent to help were on the brink  
of disaster. I had to do everything in my power to save them,  
not just for the Federation's sake, but for all our sakes. If  
we can form an agreement, a pact that you will allow me to continue  
as long as I'm able...even if it means endangering my life, you  
*must* let me do what I must do. I know it goes against the grain  
Beverley, but it must be that way, and in return, I will agree  
to being absolutely honest with you. No more.. "I'm fine"...If  
I'm unwell I will come to you, you have my word."  
Beverley rose from the sofa and walked slowly around the room.  
"You ask a lot Jean-Luc. My greatest fear, the same fear  
that kept me from admitting my love for you all those lonely years,  
was that you would one day be brought to me and I wouldn't be  
able to save you. It happened Jean-Luc. If we had been unable  
to get to Arok, you would've died. What would I have done then?  
How could I have gone on without you?"  
Beverley turned away, not wanting Jean-Luc to see the tears that  
ran down her face. He approached quietly from behind, gently turned  
her and took her into his arms.  
"Shhh my lovely. We will talk more later. For now just let  
me hold you."

 

 

 

 

 

 

Time passed. The Enterprise received new orders sending  
her on a quiet mapping mission in a distant sector, giving the  
bulk of her crew a little, albeit rare, downtime. The Captain  
had fared well with Starfleet. He was admonished for his actions  
involving the hypospray, but this was weighed against the success  
of the mission and he survived with a verbal reprimand that wouldn't  
appear on his record.  
The man in question was on a new, more personal, mission. He had  
decided to court the doctor....to woo her, and was thoroughly  
enjoying himself. They had enjoyed each other's company, at dinners  
in their quarters, holodeck outings and lovely walks in the arboretum.  
And Beverley? Ahh well....she was delighted. With each date the  
hurts, the walls, slowly crumbled and although they had not resumed  
a physical relationship, they were becoming intimate in other  
ways, exploring, discovering things about each other and taking  
their time about it.  
Beverley stood in front of the mirror in her quarters and smiled  
wistfully. Twirling slowly, she admired the pretty linen sun dress  
she wore. Jean-Luc had told her their next date was to be a summer's  
day picnic on the holodeck. Taking a light blue scarf she swept  
her hair back and tied it. Satisfied, she was moving to the main  
room when the door announcer sounded.  
"Come in."  
Jean-Luc stepped over the threshold and looked about for Beverley,  
finally spotting her and letting out a low whistle, bringing a  
blush to her cheeks.  
"You look utterly delectable."  
Beverley moved to stand before him, close enough to smell his  
scent....a fresh maleness mixed very subtly with a hint of musky  
aftershave. He stood there, dressed in loose fitting white cotton  
shirt and pants....she thought he'd never looked so handsome.  
She remained very still, closed her eyes and drew a long inhalation,  
savouring the heady desire that surged through her.  
Jean-Luc quietly placed the picnic basket he was carrying on the  
floor and gently took Beverley in his arms. Her eyes remained  
closed as his lips softly grazed hers.  
"Mmmmmm, that's nice....."  
Her arms came up and around his neck. Still with eyes closed she  
said,  
"More?"  
His reply was a low growl followed by a more insistent kiss and  
a more ardent embrace.  
"Perhaps we should have our picnic here....."  
Beverley sighed.  
"Tempting........"  
But opening her eyes she grinned widely, then laughed delightedly.  
"Come on you rogue.....I want to go on a picnic!"  
Hand in hand they left the cabin, Beverley appreciating the gesture,  
another obstacle overcome. If they were to have a relationship  
it would be in the open, for all to see. No more secrets.  
On arriving at the holodeck, Jean-Luc keyed in some commands and  
the doors parted to reveal a beautiful bush setting that Beverley  
was unfamiliar with.  
"Oh Jean-Luc....this is stunning. Where are we?"  
Breathing deeply, Jean-Luc looked around.  
"It's a National Park in Australia, just north of Melbourne  
in fact. I went there many years ago and was quite taken with  
it. The program was sent to me by a friend at the Academy office  
there. Wait till you see the waterfalls."  
"What is that smell?"  
Jean-Luc smiled.  
"Eucalyptus....refreshing isn't it?"  
The couple wandered down a track listening to birdsong and the  
ever increasing sound of the falls. Jean-Luc left the picnic basket  
on a table and they made their way to a viewing platform above  
the drop.  
"Oh, Jean-Luc....it's wonderful...look at the ferns growing  
on the sides... and the spray....look!, a rainbow."  
Beverley stretched her arms out and her hands disappeared into  
the prism of light, delighting both of them.  
They stayed a while at the falls, then made their way back to  
the basket.  
"Beverley, would you like to use the table, or shall we find  
a fern glade and put down the blanket?"  
Slipping her hand in his, Beverley leaned in and gently nuzzled  
his neck, whispering,  
" The blanket please."  
It took little time to find a suitable glade, one that was beside  
one of the fall's feeder creeks. The pair spread out the blanket  
and set out the food, a selection of fruit, cheeses and bread,  
with some white wine.  
"I'll put the bottle in the creek, it'll stay cool there."  
Beverley came to sit next to Jean-Luc as he placed the bottle  
in the cold mountain water.  
"Jean-Luc! What are they?"  
Following her pointing hand, the Captain peered into the water.  
"Oh......they're called "yabbies", a form of fresh  
water crayfish, sort of like a lobster. Be careful....those claws  
are very powerful."  
"Can you eat them?"  
Jean-Luc looked curiously at his companion.  
"Err, yes.....surely you don't want me to....."  
"No, of course not. I was just wondering, that's all. Come  
on, let's eat, I'm starving!"  
The next half an hour passed with much munching and smacking of  
lips. As Jean-Luc had promised, the wine quickly chilled and it  
was a lazy pair who idly teased each other with blades of grass  
in the hot afternoon.  
Beverley rolled to her side and grasped a paper napkin and started  
to fan herself.  
"Hot, my lovely?"  
"Deliciously so, my gallant Captain"  
"Well, not for too much longer....."  
"What...."  
Just as Beverley started to speak, a gentle rain started to fall.  
It crept through the trees with a whispering sound, bathing the  
bush in precious water, triggering the release of the sweet smells  
of the multitude of plant life there.  
Placing her hands behind her, the doctor arched her back and turned  
her face to the rain's caress. Jean-Luc was entranced. Never had  
he seen her so alluring. He moved to her side and slowly....gently...kissed  
her neck, bringing a sigh and a shudder.  
Together the two lowered themselves to the ground and looked lovingly  
into each other's eyes.  
"May I kiss you Beverley?"  
"Mmmmm."  
"And may I caress you Beverley?"  
"Mmmmm."  
"And may I..."  
"Shhh, Jean-Luc.....listen to the rain...."  
Jean-Luc closed the space between them and kissed Beverley with  
all the tenderness he possessed. Their arms entwined, as did their  
bodies, the heat growing. With increased intensity he kissed her  
deeper, harder, moulding himself to her curves. His hand began  
a journey, the fingers tracing a path from her brow, down her  
face, over her shoulder, gently, confidently, pausing at her breast.....a  
caress...then onward, down her flank to the rise of her hip and  
lower still, to the hem of her dress, then a reversal of direction  
as his hand glided up over the silken length of her thigh... and  
still he kissed her. He could feel the racing of their hearts,  
could see the flush over their skin. His hand met the juncture  
of her legs and she moved to accommodate him. He was just about  
to......  
~Sickbay to Dr. Crusher.~  
They froze. Seen from above they appeared as if in stasis, rigid,  
unmoving. A moment passed.....then another....  
~Dr.Crusher, this is sickbay. Please respond.~  
They broke apart, his brusque movements showing his anger.  
"Sickbay, this is Dr.Crusher. Go ahead."  
Jean-Luc was angry. He wanted so badly to take this last step,  
to completely close the remnants of the rift. He loved this woman,  
he desired this woman and he wanted her. The sexual tension was  
difficult enough to deal with at any time....but now?....right  
now?  
He stood quickly and with tense movements, crossed to the creek  
and sitting, plunged his bare feet into the cold water. The conversation  
going on behind him was ignored and after a little while he sensed  
her presence at his back.  
"Trying to cool off?"  
A grunt was her only reply.  
"Jean-Luc, I have to go to sickbay soon, but I would like  
to continue this...."  
She nuzzled his neck, her hands spreading themselves over his  
chest and brushing his nipples.  
"And this...."  
Beverley was biting his earlobe when Jean-Luc began to turn toward  
her. Their lips were about to meet when Jean-Luc cried out loudly  
in pain.  
"What! What is it?"  
Rolling on his side, Jean-Luc dragged his feet from the creek  
and lunged at his right foot. Beverley couldn't see what was happening.  
The Captain was still yelling and desperately trying to get to  
his right foot. He rolled onto his back and Beverley got a look  
at what was assailing him. A very large yabbie had sunk one of  
it's claws into the side of the Captain's foot. The laceration  
was deep and bleeding freely.  
"Get it off!" he yelled.  
"How?" she shrieked.  
"Hit it!"  
Casting about Beverley found the empty wine bottle and with one  
motion, picked it up and smashed it on Jean-Luc's foot.  
A fresh bellow of pain and outrage issued forth.  
Beverley had missed the yabbie completely. Jean-Luc's foot was  
now deeply cut in three more places and badly bruised. The yabbie,  
having counted it's blessings, let go of the foot and plopped  
back into the water.  
"Why the hell did you do that!"  
"You told me to hit it!"  
Jean-Luc bent forward and cradled his injured foot in his hands.  
"The yabbie, not my damned foot!"  
Feeling the beginnings of irritation Beverley said tersely,  
"Show me your foot. Really Jean-Luc, anybody would think  
you were being murdered the way you carry on."  
"I'll have you know Doctor, that was a very painful bite,  
not to mention being battered with a glass bottle!"  
By now, Beverley had inspected the injured foot and had to agree  
it did look painful. The bruising was beginning to develop and  
she suspected there were broken bones. The wounds were deep and  
there was blood covering most of the foot. A trip to sickbay was  
needed and in the meantime Beverley untied her scarf and expertly  
wound it about the foot.  
"There, that should do until we get to sickbay. I'll order  
a gravibed."  
"No! I'll walk."  
Beverley momentarily closed her eyes and counted to ten.  
"Jean-Luc.....you cannot walk on that foot. It would be...."  
"Then beam me there."  
"Do you want to appear on my sickbay floor sitting on you  
backside?"  
That brought a scowl.  
"Definitely not."  
"Then take my advise....as your *Doctor* and let me call  
for a gravibed."  
The scowl deepened but the Captain knew that this was just the  
sort of situation they had discussed. He had to trust Beverley  
and acquiesce, his pride swallowed.  
"Very well."  
The summoned gravibed arrived with two orderlies in attendance,  
(much to the Captain's embarrassment), and the trip to sickbay  
was mercifully quick, although the few crew members they encountered  
couldn't quite mask either their surprise or their grins.  
Speaking to one of the orderlies, Beverley said,  
"Maws help the Captain onto the biobed please."  
"I don't require any....."  
A sour look stalled the report.  
Once seated on the bed, Beverley unwrapped the foot and ran a  
scanner over it.  
"Alyssa.....I need an osteo regenerator, a stage three auto  
suture and a protoplaster. Maws, clean the Captain's foot please."  
Picard looked at his foot then at Beverley.  
"An osteo regenerator?"  
Blushing slightly, Beverley had the good grace to look embarrassed.  
"Ah...yes. It would seem you have a few broken bones."  
"A few?"  
"Four, actually."  
The scowl returned.  
It took little time for the treatment, although it was too long  
for the Captain, his mood was still sour. When she finished, she  
dismissed her attending staff and spoke softly to Jean-Luc.  
"I'm sorry this happened Jean-Luc. Perhaps we could have  
dinner later....in my quarters?"  
Jean-Luc sighed and shook his head.  
"Ah....I don't think so Beverley. I'm quite tired, maybe  
I'll just have a quiet time by myself."  
Beverley gently touched his face.  
"All right.....have a good rest."  
"Thank you Beverley."  
The Captain nodded, slid off the bed and made his exit, trying  
not to favour his foot and failing. Beverley watched him and sighed  
in resignation, a frown marring her face.  
*What am I to do with you, Jean-Luc?*,  
and returned to the duty that had called her from the holodeck.

 

 

 

 

Jean-Luc reached his quarters, entered and flung  
himself onto the sofa, putting his foot up on the low table.  
"Dammit! Bloody yabbie! Bloody bottle!"  
He sat and sulked until he began to brood. Fortunately he recognised  
what he was doing and decided that a long hot shower was in order.  
Rising from the sofa, he went to his bedroom, stripped and entered  
the shower, setting the control for heat.  
The water hit his back with a satisfying shock. He raised his  
hands, placing them on the wall in front of him and bowing his  
head, he felt the tension begin to abate. When he finally left  
the shower he was squeaky clean and thoroughly relaxed. He put  
on his robe and went into the main room. This time when he seated  
himself on the sofa, he had a small smile on his face and a completely  
different attitude. He swung his feet up, put a cushion under  
his head and drifted off to sleep His last thoughts were of Beverley.....  
*Tomorrow Beverley, tomorrow.*

 

 

 

The good doctor had just returned to her cabin after  
completing her tasks and she, by an amazing coincidence, was thinking  
about none other than Jean-Luc. It had been several hours since  
she had seen him and she wondered if he had gotten over his pique.  
Beverley felt somewhat unsettled, vaguely aroused and she knew  
it would continue to disrupt her thoughts unless she did something  
about it. The more she thought about the good Captain, the more  
aroused she became.  
"This is ridiculous! I'm behaving like a lovesick teenager."  
With determined actions, Beverley showered and changed into soft  
leggins and her favourite blue jumper. She didn't feel as relaxed  
as she hoped, however, the arousal, the heat was still there and  
she realised the only man to assuage it didn't want any visitors.  
She tried to read, she paced, she called sickbay to see if there  
was anything she could do, and nothing helped. Finally, in desperation,  
she decided to go to the gym for a very vigorous workout. She  
left her quarters and marched quickly through the corridors but  
an odd thing happened. Instead of turning left towards the gym,  
she found she had turned right and soon found herself at the end  
of the corridor in which the Captain's quarters were. She stood  
there thinking, weighing the consequences of knocking on his door.  
It was late....he would be asleep....he said he wanted to be alone.....  
"Oh, Jean-Luc....if only you knew......"  
There was no getting around it. Her heart was overruling her head  
and her feet took her to his door almost without Beverley being  
aware of it.

 

 

 

 

 

By this late hour, Jean-Luc had abandoned the  
sofa and was stretched out luxuriously on his back in bed. The  
small smile was still evident....and so was his obvious arousal.  
It was a particularly *nice* dream. It was the third sounding  
of the door chime that finally got through the images of his dream.  
With a start, Jean-Luc sat up and stared into the darkness. Not  
needing the light, he donned his robe, being careful to make sure  
he was adequately covered, and made his way to the door.  
"Come."  
At first Beverley couldn't see the Captain in the gloom so he  
stepped forward into the light spilling into his cabin.  
"What an odd coincidence.....I was just dreaming about you."  
Beverley raised a hand to her chest and smiled.  
"I hope it was pleasant.....not a nightmare....."  
"Oh it was exceedingly pleasant."  
"How's your foot?"  
Looking down, Jean-Luc wriggled his toes.  
"Fine, just fine....thank you."  
"Good, that's good."  
The two stood in silence for a few awkward moments, then Beverley  
broke the spell.  
"Well, it's very late.....I should be getting back."  
"You came at this hour to ask about my foot?"  
Placing her hands behind her back, the doctor looked at the floor.  
"Not exactly."  
Jean-Luc tilted his head so he could see her face.  
"Why then?"  
"I was....ummm...restless, I couldn't sleep."  
"Oh."  
Another short silence ensued, this time Jean-Luc ventured,  
"Would you like to come in.....have a cup of tea perhaps?"  
Beverley stepped forward and the doors closed.  
"Actually, Jean-Luc, I had something else in mind."  
"Oh? And what would that be?"  
Beverley stepped closer and wound her graceful arms around his  
neck.  
"This....."  
She kissed him. Such a sweet kiss, tender, yet so passionate.  
Jean-Luc's eyes drifted shut and he took her in his strong arms  
and returned the kiss, pressing himself close to her form. Her  
eyes opened briefly as she felt his desire and she couldn't hide  
her smile, her lips curling up even as they kissed. Jean-Luc was  
delighted and growled appreciatively, running his hands up and  
down her back. The kiss ended and Jean-Luc nuzzled Beverley's  
neck, whispering.....  
"Let me make love to you."  
Beverley was so overwhelmed all she could do was smile and nod,  
a small tear glistening in her eye.  
Taking her hand, Jean-Luc walked backwards to his bedroom leading  
Beverley slowly across the room. Once beside the bed they began  
the sensuous ritual of undressing each other, slowly, kissing  
and caressing the newly exposed skin. Beverley looked longingly  
at Jean-Luc's naked form, her eyes travelling from his feet to  
his face and she gasped when she looked into his glittering eyes.  
Such love....desire....utter passion was evident there....  
They sank slowly to the bed and were covered by the passing starlight.  
Their exploration of each was leisurely and thorough, each taking  
great care to bring delight and pleasure to the other. Time had  
no meaning, it could have been minutes, it could've been hours  
such was their total immersion in each other and when he entered  
her....when they became one, it was with joy and love never before  
felt with such intensity. They made love languidly at first, testing,  
tasting, slowly increasing in strength and ardour until the climax,  
the explosion sent them over the edge into oblivion.  
They slept, and later that night, made love again. As they lay  
entwined, Beverley's head resting on Jean-Luc's shoulder, drifting  
deliciously in and out of sleep, Jean-Luc was overcome with his  
love for this incredible woman. He kissed her and said,  
"I love you Beverley."  
Rousing herself at the emotion in his voice she propped herself  
on her elbow and looked down at him in the darkness.  
"And I love you, Jean-Luc Picard."  
"Are we healed Beverley? Have we closed the gap?"  
Beverley was dismayed to see tears sliding down Jean-Luc's handsome  
face.  
"Yes my love. We know who and what we are now. No more secrets  
We are here for each other."  
She lowered her lips to his and kissed him, to reassure him that  
she was there and that she loved and understood him.  
"Beverley......."  
"Mmmmm."  
"I really liked the way you checked my foot....."  
"Go to sleep, Jean-Luc."  
The End.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


End file.
